Family Night
by Celebony
Summary: As Hogwarts starts a quarterly Family Night, Harry is determined take part. Facing the heartache of looking in all the wrong places, he'll have to discover the true meaning of family, and that sometimes it comes from where you least expect it. COMPLETE
1. Part One

**Author's Note: **Hey everyone! Okay, so here is my first piece of fanfiction that's not in the Recnac universe. It's going to be 5 chapters, so it's pretty short.

WARNING: Remus is definitely OOC in this fic, but I had to do it. I don't need reviews pointing out that Remus would never do this because I already know it. I had to take artistic license for the plot to work, and I just couldn't see the Dursley's being manipulative in this way, or Harry caring that much about them coming. This was the lesser of the two stretches, but if you cannot stand to see Remus as not his nice self, don't read. (Though there is reason behind his OOCness, it's not just a random change of character.)

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy it! Read and Review! Big thanks to Katie (who loves Snape) for being a wonderful beta, who close read this thing like you all wouldn't believe and was wonderfully honest. Thank you Katie!

Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world belongs to J.K Rowling.

**Family Night**

Part 1

The idea had come about to ease some of the tension that came from separating families at a time of war, as of course was inevitable with children attending a boarding school. Nervous students could have something to work toward and know they'd be seeing their family occasionally, a comforting thought in such volatile times. Parents could check on their kids without panicking anyone. If marks rose as a consequence, all the better.

When Dumbledore announced the new quarterly Family Night, most were enthusiastic about the idea, especially since the restrictions on underage magic didn't allow students to show off what they had learned to their parents during their vacations. There would be projects to prepare for the events, huge feasts, and tours of the castle, which would be amusingly nostalgic for the wizarding parents and exciting for the Muggle ones.

It turned out to be a success. Students worked hard to prepare for their eager parents and everyone seemed to have fun, especially in watching the Muggles explore the castle for the first time.

Yes, everyone loved the idea…except for one person…well two if one counted Professor Snape, but he, of course, never loved anything.

As the night approached its feast, Harry Potter was found alone outside at the far bank of the lake, skipping stones sadly across its surface. Ron and Ginny had, of course, offered to share their family with him, but Harry declined, knowing both that it wouldn't be the same and that the two needed their own chance to shine.

He looked up as his favorite professor made his way toward him.

"'Ello there, Harry, why aren't yeh in with the others?" a concerned Hagrid asked once he got to his favorite student.

Harry shrugged. "Not my scene," he said with a sad smirk.

"I thought yeh were going to ask Remus Lupin ter come," the giant asked in concern.

Harry avoided his gaze and swallowed hard. "I did."

"Oh, was he busy?" Hagrid asked sympathetically.

"No," Harry said dejectedly. "I think he's actually a bit mad at me. About the Sirius thing. I think he blames me, not that he shouldn't. I know it's my fault, but—"

"Ah, Harry, no! It's not yer fault! I'm sure Remus just had other things he had ter do," Hagrid said, putting a heavy hand on Harry's shoulder.

"He said he'd come only if I had something special to show him, but otherwise, he didn't have the time," Harry sighed.

"Well, did yeh tell him yer first in yer class in Defense? If that's not special, I dunno know what is!" Hagrid said supportively. Harry shot him a weak smile of thanks.

"Yeah, I told him and he said he'd think about it, but then he sent me a letter saying he'd come next time if I improved my studies."

Hagrid frowned at this but didn't let Harry see his disapproving look. "Well, just so yeh know, yer Care of Magical Creatures project was fantastic. Pretty much every one else did theirs on unicorns and I didn't even teach that lesson," Hagrid said grumpily.

"That's only 'cause people are attracted to pretty things and topics that are easy to research, like unicorns; it's no reflection on your teaching Hagrid," Harry reassured him.

Hagrid reluctantly looked back to the Care of Magical Creatures class area in the distance. "Well, Harry, I have ter finish setting everything up fer when the parents finish their meal. Are yeh going ter be okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Harry said dismissively. "I've never much liked these things anyway. We had to go through them in my elementary school, too. I'll just use the time to do some studying."

Hagrid nodded and patted Harry's shoulder as he stood. "Well, don't overdo yerself, okay?"

"Okay," Harry nodded, rubbing his shoulder soothingly as Hagrid made his way back to his classroom.

But Harry had a plan. Last year, his failure to study Occlumency had cost Sirius his life, and Remus obviously knew it. Harry wanted to show Remus he could take his studies seriously, even though it was too late for his godfather. He would work harder than he ever had before at school and raise his marks to give Remus a reason to come to the next Family Night. Maybe he could prove to Remus that he was changing, maturing, trying to become something more than a liability to the ones he cared about. Maybe if Remus could see how far he'd come, Harry would finally have someone be proud of him.

Hermione was ecstatic about Harry's new study plan. As he hadn't quite told them why he had started it, Hermione was convinced Harry was finally realizing that she had been right all along and was trying to pull his marks up for his final few years before having to lookfor work in the wizarding world.

Ron was horrified, of course, and agreed to study with Harry and Hermione only as much as he normally did, and otherwise opted to hang out with the other Gryffindor boys until Harry decided to come to his senses.

So Harry and Hermione worked together, Harry resolving to study every moment that Hermione did, as torturous as it seemed, especially since Hermione was notoriously the most vigorous studier in the school. At least it took his mind off the previous year and the pain that constantly reminded him that Sirius was gone.

And the studying paid off. His teachers kept him after class to congratulate him on how his marks had improved, aside from Snape of course. He even improved his grades in Divination. After all, he had thought Occlumency was useless and after what had happened regarding that, he wasn't prepared to make that assumption about any discipline again.

As the next Family Night rolled around, Harry proudly sent his grades off with letter to Remus asking him to come to the next Family Night.

When he got the letter back from Remus saying he would be at Hogwarts for it, Harry was beyond relieved. He made sure his projects were perfect and when the night arrived, made sure he looked nice, and even tried to wrestle with his hair for a good half hour.

He stood with Hermione and Ron near the entrance as they waited for the adults, Harry fidgeting nervously.

"Harry, calm down," Hermione said with an amused laugh, happy for Harry that he was finally having someone come to one of these things, as she was sure the Dursleys hadn't when he was child in Muggle school.

Remus was actually the first of the adults to arrive among those the trio was expecting, but missed Harry as he wrestled his way through the sea of parents and students. Harry excitedly said goodbye to his friends as Ron spotted the familiar group of redheads entering the doors, and pushed his way through the crowd to his old Defense professor.

"Remus! Remus!" he called as he broke free of the crowd, wondering where the man was going as he moved down the hall. Wasn't it obvious Harry would have been with the other students?

Remus turned around and saw Harry running up to him, his blank expression making Harry's excitement take a nosedive into worry. He tried not to let it show and hugged Remus, not being able to contain his relief.

When Remus made no move to return the gesture, Harry awkwardly broke away and walked with Remus as the man began making his way up the grand staircase.

"Oh, did you want to look around first? The classroom stuff isn't until after the feast and I think that's in a half hour or so. I could show you the Gryffindor common rooms if you wanted, so you could see them again. Did I tell you I'm top of my class in Defense?" he asked eagerly, trying to get Remus to even look at him. "Um, well, thank you for coming and everything. It means a lot, especially since the Durs…"

Harry was cut off as Remus stopped and turned to him with a careful expression. "I'm sorry my letter misled you, Harry. I told you I'd be at Hogwarts tonight, but I didn't mean for this. I needed to collect my Wolfsbane potion from Professor Snape."

Harry felt as if his stomach had flipped over and his lungs had forgotten how to function. "Oh?" he squeaked out.

Almost as if he'd heard his name used, Snape appeared in that moment, seeming to be in a more foul mood than usual, probably because of the cheerful families and students milling about.

"Ah, how endearing, the werewolf came not only to get his potion, but to see the Gryffindor golden boy in all his glory," Snape sneered sarcastically.

"Actually, I just came for the potion, Severus. If we can go collect it now, I'll be on my way," Remus said, actually catching Snape off guard, something that was said to be nearly impossible. The Potions master looked between the two calculatingly, before nodding.

"Very well, I'm on my way to the dungeons now."

Remus nodded and began to follow, but Harry desperately grabbed his arm.

"Well, did you maybe want to stay? I mean, the full moon's not for a few days and you wouldn't have to stay long. You could just see a couple of my projects maybe?" he asked, hating the pleading quality of his voice but not being able to do anything to quell it. "Even just my Potion's one since you're on your way to the dungeons anyway. It's not the best but I worked really—"

"Maybe next time Harry. Last year you didn't make much of an effort in things people were trying to teach you; if you prove to me you're really trying this next quarter, I'll come to the next one," he said, sounding so cold for the normally friendly man.

Harry couldn't stop the pleas from leaving his lips. "Do you even want to stay for the feast? You could just leave after if you wanted and we could eat and talk since I haven't really talked to—"

"I said no, Harry. When you've deserved it, we'll talk."

And then the two adults were gone, down toward the dungeons for what Remus had actually come for, leaving Harry standing alone in the corridor.

Harry felt abandoned and confused. He knew he couldn't go back to the feast, couldn't face the questions people were bound to ask. Even thinking about food right now made him feel nauseous…or maybe that wasn't just the thought of food.

The more he replayed what had just happened over in his head, the more rejected and sick he felt, until he slapped a hand to his mouth and raced toward the bathroom, making it just in time. He crashed to his knees and threw up into the toilet.

After, he sat on the floor for awhile, figuring out what he was going to do for the night, not wanting to run into his friends or their families. He considered going to the Room of Requirement, but knew the DA members might be in and out, showing it off to their parents.

He heard someone walk by and, knowing of only a few people who wouldn't currently be at the feast and in this area of the castle, peaked his head out the door. Sure enough, he saw Remus's back as he made his way down the hall toward the staircase.

Harry numbly went to the top of the stairs and watched Remus hurry down the hall toward the main doors.

He stood there in slight shock until he heard the rustle of people getting up from their seats. Knowing the feast had ended, Harry just started running, trying to think of a part of the castle nobody would go. He had to be alone right now; he could tell he was going to cry, as shamed as he was to admit it, and the only thing he could think to do was to make sure nobody would see him do it.

He was running passed a statue when he skidded to a halt, remembering it was the entrance to a passage the Weasley twins had mentioned that had caved in. Luckily, he had memorized the tricks to get in each one, as he had initially found the thought of secret passages enthralling.

After stuttering the password, the passage opened and Harry crawled inside, lighting his wand to keep himself from plunging into total darkness.

And while the rest of the school laughed and happily caught up with their families, Harry Potter sat huddled in an abandoned passage, curled into a ball, crying softly to himself at having been dealt the harsh pain of rejection, not for the first time in his life.

!

Harry entered his third quarter with a new mission. He would get A's in all of his classes, no matter what it took. His goal was to be the top student in as many classes as possible. His first step had been to go to the professors of the few classes in which he was not making A's (though with all his work from the previous quarter, many of his grades _were_ A's) and asking for extra tutoring. McGonagall had already agreed to it the previous year while trying to prove to Umbridge that even evil dictators like her could not stop Minerva McGonagall from helping her student become an Auror. And that was the excuse he used with all his teachers. They didn't have to know he'd already decided that being an Auror was about the last thing he'd ever want to be.

After his improvement the previous quarters, everyone he asked was eager to help him if he was willing to put in the extra effort, with the exception of Snape, of course, who was never _eager_ about anything except taking points away from Gryffindor and assigning detentions. But shockingly, Snape agreed…after a very long lecture about how Harry shouldn't think he was special because of it.

Those tutoring sessions with Snape were, of course, the ones he was most anxious about. Yet surprisingly, Snape didn't use the opportunity to further verbally abuse him, other than asking if he had misplaced his brain on various occasions. Harry decided early on that he would actually have to use these study sessions for what they were and finally asked the questions that were hindering his potion-making. And to his surprise, Snape answered them. It seemed the Potions master actually enjoyed teaching when he was teaching someone who was truly trying to improve in the subject rather than doing it solely because they had to or to "show off", as he clearly thought was Hermione's motive.

To Harry's _greater_ surprise, he started to improve in potions greatly. He found it to be so much easier than he previously had, and even Snape stopped finding things wrong, which was definitely saying something. He improved in his other classes as well, but Potions was his greatest victory.

In addition to the study sessions with his professors, Harry was studying more and more often, surpassing even Hermione in his time spent reading through notes and books. The bushy-haired girl was slightly horrified at the idea of someone studying more than her, and tried to catch up, but when Ron began asking her on dates, she had something besides knitting elf-clothes and studying to occupy her time.

It was for these reasons, Harry began to see less and less of his friends. It hurt that his friends seemed to have gotten closer and moved on without him. They had always done everything together, and the friendships between them had always been different, but equal. But now, Harry felt as if he were being abandoned, yet he did nothing to stop it. After all, it was probably for the better after what had happened to Sirius.

So he studied harder to clear his mind of these things. When tests came up, Harry skipped meals and hours of valuable sleep in order to make sure he knew the material as well as he possibly could.

It all paid off when his test scores started coming in higher than Hermione's, and Harry knew it would only be a matter of time before he was top of certain classes rather than Hermione. Unfortunately, this was also what sparked Harry and Hermione's biggest fight they'd ever had.

"Harry," she said seriously, approaching the raven-haired boy as he was studying for their Charms exam in the common room just after the last person had gone up to bed. Ron was standing behind her, looking as if he was torn about even having this conversation. "We need to talk."

"About what?" Harry asked, setting down his book, but secretly going over the correct pronunciation of the four variations on heating charms in his head. He was pretty sure he knew about what, though. He had seen the look on Hermione's face when they got their Potions test results back.

"Look, Harry, I think it's great you're trying to pull up your marks," she started hesitantly, "but Ron and I have noticed that it's all you've been doing, really. And you haven't been eating a lot and Ron says you haven't been sleeping much…"

Harry shot Ron a betrayed look and Ron looked guiltily away.

"…and we're worried about you, Harry. I don't think this is good for your health."

Harry glared at his friends. "First off, thanks a lot for talking about me behind my back. And Ron, I'd appreciate it if you didn't report my sleeping patterns to Hermione. You're not my keeper."

Ron opened his mouth to retort, but Harry cut him off.

"And Hermione, I'm sorry I can't take you quite seriously right now as I've been studying like this for awhile now and you've been happy about it until I started getting higher grades than you," he snapped.

"Now, Harry, that's not true. I've been worried, I just…"

"You just what? You just didn't have the time to come talk to _me_ about it because you were too busy romping around with _Ron_?" Harry asked angrily.

"Hey, what is that supposed to mean?" Ron asked indignantly.

"It means that you two could be happy for me because I'm pulling my grades up, but instead, Hermione's scared I'm going to beat her in classes and so she's decided to try to take me down a few notches and you're in this because you're more loyal to her than to me!" Harry barked irritably.

"That's not fair, Harry!" Hermione shouted. "How dare you! I would never do this out of jealousy! I'm concerned for you! I don't even understand why you're doing this!"

Harry hadn't quite told his friends about what Remus had said that night, instead favoring the story that Remus had said he absolutely couldn't stay, but wanted to see Harry before he had to go off.

"Why? Don't you think I can be smart, Hermione? I know you think I'm an idiot and that I don't try at anything, but guess what, I can. I can put in the effort just as well as you can!"

"I know you can and I know you're smart! Look, Harry, does this have something to do with Ron and I being together?" Hermione asked cautiously.

"God, Hermione, not everything is about you! I'm just raising my grades for my own reasons. I'm not trying to beat you and I'm certainly not trying to stop you two from cuddling or whatever it is you two do together," Harry yelled angrily.

"Merlin, Harry, listen to yourself! It's like I don't even know you anymore!" Hermione said, sounding horrified.

"Good!" Harry yelled, jumping up. "You should be thankful! The old Harry _sucked_. I was irresponsible and all I did was get people killed! I don't know if you can wrap your far superior mind around the concept, but one day, while you and Ron are off snogging somewhere, I'll be fighting Voldemort and if I want to stand a chance against him I have to be prepared!" he shouted, waving a book around before slamming it onto the table.

"You won't have to fight him," Ron said quietly, sounding a bit frightened. "Dumbledore will…"

"Nope, sorry Ron, but you're wrong. Because there happens to be a little prophecy, yeah, the one from the Ministry we thought was lost forever, but I know what it said because Dumbledore knew. And it's me or Voldemort and let me tell you, it's not looking so good for me right now."

His two friends were shocked into silence and before one of them could think of something to say, Harry snatched up his books and notes. "So, Hermione, I'm sorry you're concerned with your grades, but I have bigger things to worry about right now and I'm not going to stop studying just to make you feel better," he said coldly.

He hurried up to his dorm just long enough to grab his invisibility cloak and throw it over himself. His two friends were still sitting near the fire when he came back down, and though they couldn't see him, they could hear him walking passed them toward the portrait.

"Harry, please wait. We need to talk about…"

But the portrait door slammed shut again before she could finish.

Ron sighed. "Well that went well," he said sarcastically, caught between anger and confusion. "What's happened to him? He's so different now."

"I think that's what sleep deprivation, stress and under-eating does to a person. They can get irritable and paranoid," Hermione stated simply, and Ron was sure she'd read up on it as soon as she had become worried about their friend. "It's because of the Family Night thing, I'm sure of it. He started this after the first one and asked all the professors for tutoring right after the second one."

"Do you think something happened those nights? Like maybe somebody said something to him?" Ron asked. "Do you think Malfoy said something to him?"

"Could be," Hermione said in a dismissive tone that indicated she was thinking more along the lines of something else. "Ron, why don't you write your parents and ask them if they know what Remus needed to do that night. I think Harry said it was Order business, so your parents will probably know."

"You think it has something to do with You-Know-Who?" Ron asked in concern.

"I'm more interested in whether he actually had business to attend to rather than what it was," Hermione said, eyebrows knitted in worry for their friend.

"You think he lied to Harry?" Ron asked in surprised.

"Well, I could be wrong, Remus might have had something he had to do. But if he didn't, I sure _hope_ he lied to Harry about it."

Ron looked at her, bewildered.

She sighed and continued. "Because if he didn't lie to Harry, that means Harry lied to us and there has to be a reason he'd do that. I don't know why Remus would have left otherwise, but if it's had this effect on Harry…I just have a feeling it was bad."

Harry woke up the next morning with that uncomfortable jerk that comes from waking when you never intended to go to sleep in the first place. Looking around in confusion, he realized he was once again on a couch in the Room of Requirement, papers strewn about the desk in front of him, with a coffee maker at the foot of the couch that was responsible for helping Harry only get a couple hours of sleep the night before.

Checking his watch, he realized breakfast would be over soon. With a groan, he gathered up his things and ran to his dormitory, hoping to be able to quickly shower and change before his first class.

Remembering the fight he'd had with Hermione the night before, his stomach dropped. Though he was peeved Hermione cared more about her grades than Harry's improvement, he still hadn't wanted to get into a fight with his friends. He told himself it was for the best, and if they weren't his friends, they weren't as in as much danger, but the thought of not making things up with them soon made his heart ache even more than at Remus's rejection at the last Family Night.

On his way to Divination, he was debating with himself whether to make up with them or not, knowing he'd have to decide soon as he and Ron sat together in the next class.

When he took his seat, Ron shot him a concerned look and passed him something covered in a napkin under the table. It was a couple of scones.

"You missed breakfast," he whispered, as if Harry didn't realize it. "I'll tell you if Trelawney looks in this direction."

"Thanks, Ron," he said, more sincerely than Ron could know. The relief that filled Harry was overwhelming. Not only was Ron not mad at him, he had thought enough about him to bring him food.

Harry snuck pieces every time their professor looked the other way and when Trelawney called on him just after he'd shoved a piece of the pasty in his mouth, Ron tried to bring the attention to himself, his eyes filled with laughter when he looked at Harry trying to somehow get out of the situation. It all made Harry feel lighter than he'd felt in ages, right up until the batty professor predicted that Harry would be seeing a drop in his grades soon.

Whether it was a prediction or a threat for his goofing off, Harry immediately began to berate himself for not paying attention to the woman that had made such a vital prediction in his life. Even if he believed the discipline to be sketchy at best, what if he was wrong like he had been with Occlumency? If he misinterpreted some sign that could have saved someone's life, he would never be able to forgive himself.

As Trelawney moved toward the other side of the classroom, lecturing about what different omens meant, Ron nudged Harry as he was taking notes.

"Want to go for a fly around the pitch after classes today?" he whispered.

Harry blinked at him in surprise before looking away guiltily. "Can't," he whispered.

"Why not?" Ron asked in annoyance, already figuring the answer to that question.

"I have to study. I have to get my grades up if I'm going to be an Auror," he whispered back.

"This is ridiculous Harry," Ron hissed while Trelawney was indulging an excited Parvati Patil by telling her that her aura was pulsating. "You'll be accepted into the Auror program without killing yourself doing so."

"I'm not _killing_ myself, and I also need to defeat Voldemort in case you've forgotten," Harry whispered with a glower as he determinedly tried to see if he could see any omens from his book around the room.

"Yeah, well a break won't hurt, otherwise you're going to drive yourself crazy," Ron protested, but Harry didn't respond. Ron let out an exasperated sigh. "Look, Harry, does this have to do with Family Night?" he asked carefully.

Harry's head whipped up so fast, Ron was a bit worried he'd get whiplash.

"What?" he asked in a quiet, but angry voice.

"Why don't you forget about Lupin and just hang out with my family. Mum would love to…"

"Don't be stupid, Ron. Why would I care about some stupid night where everyone brags to their parents? This is about Voldemort and my future," Harry insisted. "Besides, Remus is coming to the next one," he added, not looking at Ron. "Now, can you quiz me on what these omens mean?"

Ron gave a jerky nod and accepted the book Harry was sliding toward him, at a loss for what to do to keep from losing his best friend.

!

Snape watched with a frown as Harry Potter worked on the potion Snape had just assigned him for their tutoring session. The boy looked absolutely exhausted and stressed, as he always did nowadays. Though Snape would never admit it, he felt a bit concerned for the boy.

The display he had witnessed between Lupin and the young Gryffindor at the last Family Night had been surprising and a bit disturbing. When he had slyly tried to get information out of Lupin regarding the reasons behind the cruel way he was treating Harry, he had been unsettled to find the answer. It seemed that Sirius Black's death had been the last straw for Lupin, causing the werewolf to become a bit unhinged. The worst part of it was that he obviously was taking out all his anger and guilt out on Harry, unfairly blaming the boy for the death.

Of course, Snape agreed Harry could have put more effort into learning Occlumency, but that was no excuse for Lupin's cruelty. How could someone blame a child for such a horrible thing? Who could put that sort of guilt upon a mere teenager's shoulders, forcing him to so heavily atone for sins he had never committed?

And as usual, it seemed that only Snape, among the staff, took the situation for what it really was. The rest found it encouraging that Harry was boosting his grades and was so eager to learn. He suspected McGonagall was beginning to see there might be something wrong, but everyone else preferred to be oblivious, including the headmaster. They all thought it to be a healthy way for Harry to cope with his godfather's death. None could see the miserable boy, desperately grasping onto his last chance at a father figure, silently screaming his pleas for Lupin not to abandon him as every other adult he'd relied on had done.

"I'm done, Professor," came the anxious voice. As usual, Harry was triple checking his notes even as Snape walked over.

"It's slightly too thick. Do you know what you did and what effects that would have?" he asked.

"Erm, it was because I let the first stage cool too quickly and it would cause…it would cause a longer absorption time and weaken the effects?"

Snape raised an eyebrow. "Is that a question or an answer?"

"An answer, sir," Harry said unsurely, but making sure it was a statement.

Snape nodded. "Good."

"Should I move onto the Warming Draught, sir?" Harry asked. At Snape's surprised look, he quickly explained. "I just want to make sure I'm prepared for the test this Friday."

"No, Potter, we'll leave that until tomorrow," Snape responded. Harry actually looked disappointed, and Snape only wished it was because Harry actually liked potion-making.

"Professor, I was wondering what my current class standing was in regards to Potions grades," Harry said nervously.

Snape looked at him, careful to keep his expression neutral. "My class is not a competition, Mr. Potter. I do not give out information regarding other students' grades."

"Well, sir, you do post at the end of each quarter who received the highest grade, and I just want to know if I'm close. If it's at all possible, I will do whatever it takes to have top marks. I just need to know what I need to do and I'll do it," Harry said in a determined tone, but years of reading what people _weren't_ trying to project, Snape could hear the desperation that drove the request.

"Potter, take a seat, I wish to discuss something with you." Snape ignored Harry's worried look and cleaned up the mess with a flick of the wand, levitating ingredients back to their cupboards.

He gestured to the chair facing his desk and Harry warily sat. As Snape conjured up some tea, once again, ignoring the shocked look on his student's face, Harry cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Er, is it hopeless? I've tried to calculate my grade, and figure out what I'll need on each exam, but it's difficult without knowing the total quarter points and what score I need to beat, so I…."

Snape held up a hand to silence the rambling boy. Harry instantly shut his mouth. Snape pushed one of the cups of tea toward him. It was a testament to Harry's exhaustion and clouded mind that he didn't question it before taking a sip, especially after what had happened the previous year with Umbridge trying to sneak him Veritiserum.

He didn't know how to start this conversation. How did you tell a student to stop studying so much? How did you tell a student their grades were getting too high? How could you have this conversation and still keep up the impression that you never cared about anyone, particularly Harry Potter?

"Potter, has your head of house spoken to you about your study habits this quarter?" he ventured.

Harry looked confused. "Sure. She's been tutoring me in Transfiguration and she's been saying she's happy to see me trying hard at school. She's stopped lately since it was getting a bit redundant…why?"

Snape mentally cursed his colleague for not having had this talk with Harry, leaving it for him to take care of.

"Potter, what do you do aside from studying and doing homework?" Snape asked.

Harry looked slightly taken aback, but jumped on the question nonetheless. "Nothing really, I'm really serious about trying to improve my grades. I was actually just thinking I could open up some extra room for more Potions studying if it would help me get the top grade."

Snape raised his eyebrow. "Open up extra room for more studying? And what would that extra studying be replacing at this point? You already skip about half your meals, are you planning on forgoing eating all together?"

Harry now looked confused. "I eat," he said dismissively, "but if eating in someplace I can study more often would help me with Potions…."

"Potter, do not worry about your Potions grade, that's not what…"

"So I already have the top mark?" Harry blurted out, sounding relieved.

"No, you do not," Snape barked, inwardly wincing as he had not meant to let that information slip. Draco Malfoy was a natural at Potions and had the top grade without batting an eyelid. Harry was battling Hermione for second, though he wouldn't be surprised if Harry took the spot by the end of the quarter. The miserable yet resolved look on Harry's face reminded him why he hadn't wanted Harry to know this.

"Potter, do not concern yourself with who is doing better or worse than you are. Or should I say, do not concern yourself with how Remus Lupin will react to who is doing better or worse than you."

Harry looked up at him in shock. "I don't…"

"You forget I was present during your brief conversation with him at the last Family Night," Snape cut in.

"Then you should know more than anyone that I need that top space. I need to show him I'm trying and working as hard as I can," Harry said, looking away in embarrassment.

"If needed, I will inform him of your efforts in my class, but in return you will cut down your study time," Snape said sternly, not surprised when Harry looked at him in bewilderment.

"Huh? I don't understand. I want him to know I've been working really hard…"

"There's such thing as working too hard, Potter. Have you taken a peek in the mirror lately? You look like the living dead," Snape said harshly.

Harry glared at him. "You're always telling me to study _more,_ making fun of me in class, mocking me because I don't understand some concept or the other. And now that I'm studying more you want me to study less? Is it just that you don't want me to be the top of your class? Is it too horrible for you to have James Potter's son as the top of your Potions class? Is that it?" Harry demanded, voice rising angrily.

"There's a little thing called balance, Potter, and you seem to only want to tip the scale. You are jeopardizing your health," Snape said angrily.

"You know what? Forget the tutoring sessions. There's only a few weeks left in the quarter and I can do it on my own without having to deal with you trying to…trying to keep me down because you can't let go of a past grudge against my father!" Harry yelled, getting up from his seat and swinging his bag furiously over his shoulder. "You can't even see that I'm not like that! I'm not a bully nor do I purposely put myself into a spotlight nor would I ever attack someone unawares! God, I'm not my father!"

And with that he stormed from the room, slamming the door behind him.

The thing was Snape _had _realized Harry was not his father, had received his first clues from the memories he saw during Occlumency lessons and truly realizing it this year during his newest tutoring sessions with the boy. It was for that reason he was worried. James Potter was surrounded by friends, family and admirers and would bounce back relatively easily if one treated him so horribly. But _Harry_ Potter, was a very lonely boy, with hardly anyone he would trust himself to lean upon, and obviously no one he trusted enough to help him through this rough time. James Potter would not have been damaged harshly by similar events, but Snape knew that for _Harry_ Potter, this could break him.


	2. Part Two

**Author's Note: **Hey everyone! Okay, a few things: first of all, once again, Remus is OOC in this fic. Just as Harry jumped to blame Snape for Sirius's death to escape his guilt in OOtP, in this fic, Remus is blaming Harry. It's irrational, yes, but he's consumed with grief. Look what happened after James and Lily died, he left without looking back at Harry even once. But I know it's over the top and a lot of you don't like it, and I'm sorry, but Remus is not an imposter under Polyjuice or anything like that. If you don't like OOC Remus, stick to my other fics (though I'd argue he's OOC in those, just in a different way). Second, I should let you all know that this fic is pretty much already written (it's 5 chapters long, approx. 50 pages). I wrote it over the summer with no intention of posting, but my friend and beta for this fic, ckat44, convinced me to. So I probably won't be able to accommodate any requests, though I do love hearing your guesses as to what will happen. And I should warn you that this doesn't have the same plot twists and turns as my other fics, it's pretty straight forward and predictable actually, I just wanted to examine the characters in this way. Thank you for all your reviews! I hope you continue to enjoy the chapter! And thank you to ckat44 for betaing and being awesome.

Family Night

Part 2/5

A week later, Snape opened his office door to reveal a sheepish looking Harry Potter. Snape did nothing but stand aside to let his student enter.

"Professor, I want to apologize for what I said last week. I shouldn't have made those accusations that I did."

"But you still believe them," Snape said, surprisingly not in an accusatory manner. Harry opened his mouth to retort, but Snape silenced him with a hand. "Take a seat," he instructed, once again conjuring up some tea and taking his own seat behind his desk. "I haven't been seeing you at meals since we last spoke."

Harry stared into his tea. "Well, final projects, you know." He paused. "As long as I do well on them, I should be set. I got top marks in Care of Magical Creatures and Charms."

"And Defense Against the Dark Arts," Snape reminded him.

Harry nodded distractedly. "Yeah, but I got that last quarter too…"

Snape heard the silent, '_and it wasn't good enough._'

"I was so close in Transfiguration, but I'm just…I'm just bad at actually Transfiguring things," Harry said with a sigh.

"If you nearly earned the top grade in the class, I doubt your abilities in the subject are lacking," Snape reasoned, pouring himself some more tea.

Harry shook his head. "There are people who are better than me. It just comes naturally to them. They just do it on their first try and I have to spend hours practicing to get the same effect."

"Potter, I know you think you are some sort of superhuman hero, but save yourself the trouble and realize that you can't be the best at everything," Snape said seriously.

Harry shrugged, swirling his tea around distractedly. "Divination's been a disaster. I don't even think I have an A in that class," he said with a sigh. "But Remus doesn't really like Divination, so hopefully it'll be okay."

"Divination is a terrible subject that should not be taught to impressionable children who may be foolish enough to occupy their time with making moronic predictions about their future," Snape said vehemently. "If you had received too high a grade in that class, I would have lost all hope for you."

For the first time in a long time, Harry actually smiled a true smile.

"So, I am assuming you did not come down here for the sole purpose of having a chat with me," Snape said knowingly.

"I was wondering if you could look over my project plan," Harry admitted, pulling out a few scraps of paper from his pocket and unfolding them upon Snape's nod. "It's nothing spectacular, but I thought instead of making or researching a known potion I'd try to tweak one a bit. So, I took the basic pain relieving potion that's used most often in the hospital wing and am seeing if I could improve the flavor."

Snape smirked as he took the proffered paper, filled with notes and ideas. "I see this has a self-serving purpose as I believe you are the most frequently injured student Hogwarts has seen in quite a long time. You're thinking about using lime, then?"

"Yeah, I thought if I added extra newt eyes it would balance out the acidity and of course the newt eyes are one thing that effects the absorption rate, so I was curious if you thought it would improve the potion or make it dangerous," Harry ventured.

"And other flavors would require adding new ingredients…I see," Snape said thoughtfully, looking over Harry's notes. "Your theory is sound and it looks like you put an excessive amount of effort into it. Make the potion and I can test it to see if it will be harmful with some test strips."

"And if it isn't?" Harry asked worriedly.

"Then it isn't. I'll add extra credit if it is correct, but if it is not, I will not dock points. This is what potions making is all about, theorizing, testing and often failing," Snape said reasonably. He would be hypocritical if he punished Harry for being wrong when he had created disastrous potions with sound theories, but most of all, he just couldn't bring himself to add any extra stress to the boy's shoulders.

Harry nodded, biting his lip as he scanned his notes once again. "Er, sir? If it doesn't work, would you mind not mentioning it to Remus?"

"I personally think you should not put so much stock in what that man thinks of you. You must realize he is reacting badly to his friend's death and taking it out unfairly upon you. I don't think you should count on him coming to this Family Night," Snape said realistically.

Harry's expression turned into a haunted one and he put his notes back into his pocket. "If he does come, will you please not mention the potion failing, sir?" he requested once again, in a slightly shaky tone. Snape could tell if Lupin didn't show, Harry would be absolutely crushed. He nodded sharply and Harry smiled in relief. "Thanks Professor, I'll be in the lab tomorrow working on it," he said as he stood.

"Take a day off Potter, you have plenty of time to brew the potion," Snape instructed. "No excuses."

Harry nodded and slipped out the door before Snape could tell him not to work on any of his other projects instead.

The Potions master sat back in his chair and pinched the bridge of his nose. He couldn't help but pray that Lupin show up to Family Night.

Harry bit his lip nervously as he searched the sea of parents and siblings filing in through the door, clutching Remus's letter in his hand. This time he had been sure not to interpret it incorrectly, not that it left much room for questioning after Harry had sent a letter to clarify whether Remus's "I'll be there" meant for Family Night. The letter in his hand, which he had read dozens of times, simply stated that he would indeed be there specifically for Family Night.

The Grangers arrived first, greeting their daughter joyously and shaking hands with Harry and Ron, before the small family made their way off to the Great Hall, Harry and Ron assuring Hermione they'd meet her in there.

The Weasleys came soon after, and Mrs. Weasley fawned over Harry perhaps even more than Ron. Harry blushed, knowing it must have been obvious that he'd had no one at the past two nights, making it painfully clear how alone he was.

As Harry chatted with the Weasleys, he made sure to keep one eye surveying the families entering.

"You guys can go on ahead," Harry said finally, as the hall became nearly deserted and the feast opening was approaching. Mrs. Weasley looked like she was going to protest again, but Harry insisted. "I'll meet you in there when Remus shows. He said he might be a little late," he lied.

"Why don't you come sit with us, dear? If…When Remus comes, he'll be sure to find you there," Mrs. Weasley insisted. Harry tried not to notice her slip. Remus was just late; surely Harry had proved himself. He smiled reassuringly at Mrs. Weasley.

"No, really, I'll meet you in there. Remus is on his way and I wanted to get some air anyway so I'm going to wait for him outside," Harry said with more confidence than he felt.

Mrs. Weasley pursed her lips, looking almost pained. Ron looked at his friend sympathetically. Harry was thankful that at least Ginny and the twins were wrapped up in talking to their father so he didn't have to witness their obvious opinions as well.

"Alright dear, well, if something happens, you come and spend the night with us. I, for one, would love to see your projects and see how you're doing in your classes," Mrs. Weasley said a bit sadly, hugging Harry fiercely before the group of redheads disappeared with the last group of stragglers behind the massive doors that led to the Great Hall.

"He's just running late," Harry muttered to himself as he walked out the front doors and sat down on the top step, looking out over the road leading to Hogwarts, now completely bare for as far as he could see.

He shivered as a sharp breeze rustled his clothes, the air growing chillier as the sun began to set. Blocking out the sounds of laughter and upbeat chatter in the Great Hall, Harry settled on imagining the proud look on Remus's face as he showed his old teacher how much he had accomplished in the last quarter. He imagined Remus's forgiveness; it would be like nothing had ever been wrong. They would never even have to talk about it, just move on and be happy. And then, Remus would ask Harry to come and live with him since Sirius was not there to fulfill his promise. In fact, maybe he would tell Remus exactly how the Dursleys treated him. He would tell him about the cupboard, the chores, the starvation, the incidences that bordered on physical abuse, and he'd even tell him all the vitriolic verbal abuse he'd suffered through all his life. Then Remus would be enraged at the Dursleys and assure Harry nothing they said was true, that he was indeed worth something, not just an annoyance or a burden.

Harry swallowed against a stinging sensation in his throat and blinked his eyes rapidly, scanning the road desperately for any sign of life. He crossed his fingers and hid them between his knees, not wanting to even acknowledge to himself how desperately he was praying for Remus to show up.

When he heard the definite sounds of people beginning to leave the feast, Harry felt something inside him break. He furiously tore apart the letter in his hand and threw the pieces toward the ground, though the wind caught them and sent them flying every which way. He couldn't bring himself to face the Weasleys, didn't want them to look at his projects out of pity, feigning excitement if they didn't even care.

So, he ran. He tore passed the doors to the Great Hall just before people started exiting them. Without slowing and trying desperately to maintain control of his emotions until he got somewhere safe, he raced to his dorm to grab his invisibility cloak. Then, at a slower, but not less determined pace, he set out toward the statue that hid the secret passage he knew would lead him toward Hogsmeade.

He scrambled through the entrance quickly, not even noticing there was someone else in there until he smacked right into him, knocking off his cloak.

Malfoy managed not to look too shocked that his rival had appeared right out of thin air.

"What are you doing here, Malfoy?" Harry asked incredulously.

The blonde raised an eyebrow. "Must you sound so accusatory, Potter? You're not the only one who has rights to this castle's many secrets." He looked at Harry oddly. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing," Harry ground out, picking up his cloak.

"I thought you were supposed to have family of some sort showing up for once," Malfoy drawled.

"Yeah, well, where's _your_ family?" Harry challenged. "I don't see them slinking around here with you."

Malfoy took a swig from a small flask in his hand. "They had to leave. Some charity auction or ball or something else much more important than supporting their only son at this miserable affair," Malfoy said bitterly. Harry felt his anger dissipate, and almost felt sympathetic toward the Slytherin.

"Yeah, well, at least someone's showed up for you for the last two. Dumbledore has some really bad ideas, but I personally think this one takes the cake. And as two of his teachers have tried to kill me and one tried to spell me into insanity, that's saying something," Harry said angrily, eyeing the flask Malfoy was drinking from. "Is that alcohol?" he asked incredulously.

Malfoy chuckled and shook his head incredulously. "Potter, when you're not infuriating me, which granted, isn't very often, you are quite a riot. Were you raised by nuns? You look so scandalized that a teenager might be drinking alcohol."

"No," Harry lied defensively. "I don't care that you're drinking…"

"Vodka," Malfoy filled in with a smirk. "You don't care that I'm drinking vodka."

Harry couldn't stop his eyebrows from shooting up.

Malfoy smirked mischievously. "Do you know what effect alcohol has, Potter?"

"Yes, it makes arseholes even bigger arseholes," he said, thinking of his uncle.

Malfoy chuckled. "True, but I'm talking about some more personal effects. I'm assuming you haven't tried alcohol before, because let's face it, you're you. Let me enlighten you, Potter. Alcohol isn't permanent, but during that time when it's flowing through you, it can numb any pain you're feeling. It provides an escape, which, by the way you're running around trying to be invisible, you seem to be seeking. So what do you say?" he asked, holding up the flask enticingly. "Does the Golden Boy want to escape?"

It didn't take any effort for Harry to decide; he just wanted to escape the situation before its implication really settled into his mind. He nodded with almost no hesitancy.

Malfoy smirked and slipped his flask away. "Forget that, if I'm going to taint the Golden Boy's innocence with a bit of booze, we're going to Hogsmeade to get you hammered."

Harry followed him along the dark tunnel, feeling nervous, exhilarated, and miserable all at the same time. "But we're not eighteen," Harry protested.

Malfoy actually laughed and swung an arm over Harry's shoulder. "Potter, why don't you let me do the talking tonight? You just sit back, enjoy yourself, and try not to look too guilty."

!

A few hours later, the two were slowly making their way down the passage back to Hogwarts. Harry was stumbling, leaning heavily on Draco, who was supporting Harry the best he could while being fairly intoxicated himself.

"You know what! You know what!" Harry said excitedly, giggling and nearly tripping. "I've never been drunk before!"

Draco laughed at that, nearly leading them both into a wall. "You don't say, Potter."

"I feel…heavy," Harry said in a tone of finality as if he'd solved a very difficult problem. "Are you going to leave me here? You could 'cause you hate me and I would have deserved it 'cause I let you down."

"How have you let me down, Potter?" Draco asked, urging Harry forward.

Harry shook his head and waved his hand around, nearly smacking Draco in the face. "I dunno, that's what I do. I let people down. I should…I should make…whadyacall'em…business cards." He giggled. "'_Harry Potter….Disappointment._' That's what they'll say. I'll give you one, okay? For helping me tonight, I will. I'll give you one just for you," he said, all of a sudden quite serious as if he was promising Draco something very important. Draco raised an eyebrow.

"Give me what exactly, Potter?" he asked in amusement.

Harry shook his head and started giggling again. "Whatever I said. Quidditch. I'm giving you Quidditch…or Transmigufinoration."

Draco had to stop so he could crack up drunkenly. "You're giving me Quidditch? And…and…what!"

Harry laughed so hard he fell down and Draco had to pull him back to his feet.

"We've got a problem, Potter. The families are touring around the castle, including the dorms you are piss-arse smashed. I'd let you roam around, but I don't exactly want to be implicated in this and I don't think you're too good at keeping secrets right now. Do you know anywhere I can leave you where you won't run across any roommates or their families?" he asked.

Harry thought about that question hard before hitting Draco on the arm excitedly. "I know! I know! The Room of Requi-somethin'. I dunno. DA meetings."

"Do you know where that is?" Draco asked hopefully.

"Yes. Yes I do," Harry said with a firm nod. "Are you going to stay?"

"Doubt it, Potter. I did my duty of getting you pissed and now that duty is done. Now all I have to worry about is getting you to that room without any embarrassing run-ins," Draco said tiredly.

"We have my cloak," Harry said simply.

"Yes, but it's not going to hide sound and you can't seem to shut up."

"You shut up," Harry said, without much feeling.

Soon they had the cloak draped over them and were making their way through the halls filled with families, trying to choose the paths with the least amounts of population.

They were doing fine until Fred and George appeared in front of them from around a corner and they smacked right into them before both falling backward onto their bums, bursting into peals of drunken laughter.

"Harry?" Fred asked worriedly, seeing two pairs of feet and recognizing the type of laughter they were hearing.

"Shh…shhh….they can't see us if you don't talk," someone under the cloak was whispering.

George leaned forward and threw off the cloak, his eyebrows shooting up to not only see Harry obviously inebriated, but with a drunk Draco Malfoy to boot.

"Harry! What happened to Remus?" Fred asked in concern as George checked around the corner to make sure the rest of his family was still wrapped up in talking with Professor Flitwick.

The two boys unsteadily got to their feet. Harry moved to put a hand on Fred's shoulder but missed and stumbled forward. Fred steadied him but Harry didn't seem to notice anything amiss and patted Fred's shoulder.

"Fred, Fred, Fred," he said, shaking his head as if talking to a naïve fool, "he had more important things to do than this." He waved a hand around drunkenly. "Because I failed him. I'm a…a…failure and I fail everyone. Like Ron. And your family. I need to apologizize," he said, moving to turn the corner but Fred grabbed him and kept him out of sight, looking helplessly at his twin.

"Well, my job here is done," Draco declared, setting off, wobbling only slightly, toward the Slytherin dormitory.

"Shit, Fred, we can't let anyone see him like this," George said, stating the obvious.

Of course, that was when someone seemingly worse than the whole Weasley family came along.

"What's going on here?" Snape asked, arms crossed. He eyed Harry in surprise as the boy wobbled on the spot. He couldn't believe it; the Gryffindor Golden Boy was smashed.

"Er, nothing, Professor," George tried.

"If you were still students here, I'd take away house points for lying," he said menacingly. "Where's Lupin?"

Fred sighed. "He didn't show."

Snape's lips pursed in anger toward the werewolf. "And this is how Potter chose to deal with the situation?" he asked derisively.

"Well, a certain Draco Malfoy played a key role in…Harry, shhh," Fred ordered quickly after Harry tried to call out to Ron.

Snape sighed and shook his head. "Give him to me."

The twins looked horrified at the idea. "Professor," George started, "I don't think…"

"You don't have much of a choice, as he has broken the rules and I am his professor. Beside, I believe your family is headed this way," Snape said as he heard voices slowly getting closer.

"Please don't embarrass him, sir," Fred pleaded with a sigh as he reluctantly nudged Harry toward the Potions master.

Snape took Harry's arm and pulled him forward toward the secret passage that would lead to the dungeons as the Weasley twins tried to stall their family's approach.

As soon as they were out of sight and struggling to get down the steps, with Harry giggling each time he stumbled, Snape shook his head.

"Potter, you are a complete moron."

By the time they reached Snape's private chambers, Harry's mood had changed into the one Snape assumed had led him to drinking in the first place. Snape didn't know what to do, so went with his first instinct to start scolding him for his foolish behavior.

"Potter, I hope you realize what an idiot you made in front of the Weasley twins and probably in front of Mr. Malfoy as well. You should be thanking the deities I didn't march you straight up to the headmaster's office, or better, let you wander around in a drunken stupor. I'm sure Molly and Arthur Weasley would have loved to see that. But no, I get to be the one to deal with you instead. What joy," he spat sarcastically. He moved to continue with his tirade, but Harry had slapped a hand to his mouth and looking a sickly shade of green, raced to the bathroom and slammed the door behind him.

Snape winced as he heard the sounds of retching.

"Oh, lucky me," he muttered bitterly.

When the retching turned into muffled sobs, Snape couldn't feel as annoyed with the boy. After a few minute's indecision, he gently knocked on the bathroom door, not waiting for an answer before announcing he was coming in.

Harry was sitting against the wall, knees pulled to his chest and smearing tears across his face with his hand in a failing attempt to wipe them away. He looked up at Snape sorrowfully, looking extremely vulnerable. Snape was sure he was still drunk, even if it was in a different way than before.

"He didn't come," he whimpered as Snape cautiously kneeled beside him. "He didn't come."

Snape felt a pang of sympathy as Harry hugged his knees closer to him as if trying to protect himself from the harsh world. He kept shooting Snape desperate looks, silently begging for something Snape didn't know how to give.

"Come on Potter, you'll sleep here tonight," he said, taking Harry by the arm and carefully pulling him to his feet. Harry wiped his face on his sleeve and hung his head as he stumbled with Snape to the living room. With a wave of his wand, summoning blankets and a pillow, he had the couch set up decently enough for Harry to use.

Harry sat down on the couch and stared at the coffee table blankly, the occasional tear slipping down his cheek. Snape didn't know what to do and didn't want to have to figure it out with the situation. He had no idea how to deal with the emotions of depressed teenagers. He had to get out.

"Well, Potter, just try to get some sleep and stay here. I need to attend to the parents milling about my classroom. I will be back in a while. No snooping around and go to bed," he concluded unsurely, hoping that sounded like a stern authority figure as he left his chambers as quickly as he could manage.

When he returned after a few hours of explaining to angry parents why he believed their children were inept at potion-making, he quietly entered his chambers, his eyes immediately landed on Harry. The boy was curled up on the couch, shivering slightly from the dungeon cold, as the blanket had slipped off onto the floor.

Snape picked up the blanket and draped it over the sleeping teenager. He sighed and leaned back over to tuck the blanket in around him to make sure it wouldn't fall off again.

He took a moment to observe the boy who had been the bane of his existence. While asleep, or passed out more like, he didn't seem half as annoying. In fact, the teenager seemed a lot younger and more innocent, actually looking more vulnerable than the most homesick first year.

Snape felt a pang of protectiveness and it unsettled him so badly he practically fled to his own bedroom to put a closed door between him and the lost boy.

The next morning, Snape marched fearlessly into his living room. He faltered when he saw that Harry was still asleep on his couch. He circled the couch and stared at the boy warily. In his sleep, Harry looked defenseless, not like an arrogant savior of the wizarding world. Snape frowned to see that even an alcohol induced sleep had not been sufficient to eradicate the signs of anxiety on the teenager's face, his eyebrows slightly knitted and his arms wrapped around himself protectively.

Snape decided not to be so cowardly as to slip out of the chambers before the boy woke just to avoid the awkwardness. Besides, somebody had to lecture the teen about alcohol usage and he obviously didn't have any parental figures stepping up to bat, or at least any parental figures that didn't have their hands full with a dozen of their own children. Yet, he didn't know the proper way of waking someone up, and decided to simply make a lot of noise in the kitchen and hope that did the trick.

He heard a groan from the couch as he banged the coffee pot and glasses around and loudly ordered breakfast through the floo.

As he was setting silverware on the table, he found Harry standing in the entryway, looking anxious and quite sick at the same time.

"I imagine you probably have a bit of a hangover," Snape said with no particular emotion to his voice. He was not deluded to think that no student ever drank, and the whole situation would have actually amused him quite greatly had the circumstances that led to the drinking not been so horrible. At Harry's awkward look, Snape decided to take pity on the boy and waved to a seat. "Sit down, Potter."

Harry eased himself into a chair and stared at the banquet of food in front of him. The slightly green look to his face announced that he was not in much condition to be consuming said food. Only because he knew Harry was in desperate need of a real meal did Snape pull down a hangover remedy potion from his cupboard and empty some into a glass, setting it down in front of Harry with a bang that made Harry wince.

"Drink it, Potter," he instructed, taking the seat opposite to him.

Harry felt positively nauseous at the thought of downing the glass of greenish goop in front of him. He wondered if this was some sort of punishment. He tried putting the glass to his lips and felt his stomach roil. "I don't think I can," he admitted weakly.

"Just down it in one gulp," Snape advised, skimming the headlines on the Daily Prophet. "I'd rather not have you getting sick on my table, so drink."

Harry plugged his nose, scrunched up his eyes and drank the thing as fast as he could. For one dangerous moment, he thought he'd be sick all over his professor's table, but his nausea suddenly passed, taking with it his pounding headache.

"Thank you, Professor," he said, knowing his voice was filled with shame. He looked down at the empty plate in front of him. "Thank you for everything really. For not letting the rest of the Weasleys see me and for letting me stay here and everything. I'm sorry you had to deal with me last night. I really was planning on sleeping in the Room of Requirement or somewhere else out of the way…"

"Yes, Potter, that's a _much_ better idea. Consume a large amount of alcohol and crawl up some place where nobody can find you if it turned out you had alcohol poisoning, yes, you really did seem to have had the night planned out quite well," Snape snapped sarcastically.

Harry swallowed hard and nodded, acknowledging his own lack of judgment.

"I do not enjoy seeing any student wandering the hall intoxicated, and even less enjoy having to personally keep that student from embarrassing himself, his house and his school…"

"…in front of everyone's families," Harry filled in miserably. He was no doubt reminding himself that he had not had a family of his own to be included in that. He set his elbows on the table and buried his head in his hands. "What Fred and George must be thinking…"

At that Snape couldn't help but roll his eyes. "Please, Potter, the Weasley twins were infamous for all sorts of mischief, including alcohol consumption. Seeing a friend smashed out of their mind is not a new occurrence for them. However, I'm sure they each have a brain cell and if they rubbed those together they could probably conclude the reason behind your choice of behavior and may be rather concerned for you."

Harry looked even more shamed. It was pretty obvious he didn't understand, and was uncomfortable with, people being truly concerned for his well-being.

"Sir?" Harry asked cautiously. "I don't suppose you know if Remus was given a last minute assignment for the Order last night, do you? I know he probably didn't, but I was just wondering if you knew." He looked at Snape pleadingly.

Snape sighed and decided the truth was the best course of action, and hopefully it would knock some sense into the teen. "No, the headmaster specifically made sure he would be free for Family Night."

Harry nodded jerkily and fiddled with the edge of his shirt. "Yeah, yeah, I figured that…I just…I just hoped…" He cleared his throat and smoothed down his shirt decisively. "So, what is my punishment going to be?" Suddenly, Harry paled and his gaze shot up to meet Snape's. "I'm not going to be expelled, am I?" he blurted out fearfully.

"Potter, if Hogwarts students were expelled for such activities, I doubt half the school would graduate," he answered. Harry visually sagged in relief. "I'd say, as this is your first offence, and one of my own students was obviously involved, we can arrange something without getting the headmaster or your head of house involved."

Harry stared at him incredulously. "Really?" he asked with barely restrained hopefulness.

"If you hold up your side of the bargain," Snape said firmly.

Harry looked at him apprehensively. "And what bargain would that be, sir?"

"For starters, there is a ton of food here. Put some on your plate and begin eating. You have been skipping far too many meals," he said passively, trying to use his nonchalant tone to dissuade Harry from thinking he actually cared.

Harry hesitantly followed orders, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

As Harry ate, Snape began outlining Harry's punishment.

"First of all, no more skipping meals in the Great Hall; I don't care if you're supposedly eating outside of it. If either of your friends has their meal in the Great Hall, you will join them, and no persuading them out of meals. If neither of your friends are eating there, you will join them in meals however they do get them." Snape figured the boy's friends could keep an eye on his eating habits this way and if Harry was forced to join them for meals, perhaps it could revive their friendship a bit, as Snape noticed it had been strained as of late.

"But sir," Harry protested weakly, "um, Hermione and Ron are sort of doing their own thing now a day; you know, dating and everything. I'm sort of like the third wheel. It would be really awkward if I started coming to meals because then I have to sit with them or not and that would either be awkward or a bad statement and…"

"And yet, it's part of the deal. Unless you want me to owl Lupin for advice on the situation," Snape threatened lightly. If he had to exploit the boy's weakness to make sure the kid didn't run himself into the ground, then he would.

Harry's eyes widened and he shook his head frantically.

"Alright then. You will also start getting more sleep. I think being in bed without books of any sort by eleven on school nights, one in the morning on weekends is more than fair."

Harry gaped at him. "You're giving me a bedtime?"

Snape raised a challenging eyebrow at him.

"But what if I have a lot of homework? I don't think my professors would buy the whole 'sorry, I really would have finished but I had to obey my bedtime' thing," Harry argued.

"You'll be fine as long as you do your homework before any extra studying," Snape said confidently.

"But my grades…" Harry started desperately.

"It won't kill you if you're not at the top of every class, Potter, but it just might kill you to continue clawing at those spots," Snape said with a tone of finality, hoping Harry wouldn't start to think about the nature of these "punishments". The last thing he needed was for anyone to think he was getting soft and being concerned for anyone, especially Harry Potter. The very thought made him feel as if he needed a drink.

Harry nodded miserably.

"And to make sure you hold up your end of the bargain, I will be having a brief conference with Granger and Weasley on the matter," Snape added.

Harry looked at him furiously. "You're going to have Hermione and Ron spy on me?"

"It's not spying if you are aware of what they are doing," Snape said calmly.

"But you can't. We're not as close as we used to be. It would be so awkward. Don't you think they have their own lives to worry about without babysitting me!"

"I doubt they'd see it in that light. They seem to be quite concerned for your well being."

Harry snorted bitterly. "Fine, talk to them. Hermione will be pleased that someone's trying to make sure I don't beat her in classes anymore, and whatever makes Hermione happy will make Ron happy," he ground out.

"Remember, Potter, what this punishment is for. If you don't like the terms, I can easily pass the duty of punishment into other hands," Snape said darkly.

"No," Harry said quickly. He sighed. "I'll do it."

"Good, now finish your food," he instructed, turning back to his paper.

"I'm not hungry," Harry said distractedly.

Snape raised an eyebrow at him. "You've barely touched your plate. I frankly do not care if you're feeling hungry, you will eat more of that food. It was the first term in your…end of the bargain," he said carefully, not wanting to use the word "punishment" in regards to Harry eating normal meals.

Harry grudgingly ate a bit more, and Snape watched him struggle to get the food down with a frown. The boy must not have been eating much if his stomach was having such a difficult time accepting the small amount of nutrients.

Snape only hoped Harry would now get on the right track.


	3. Part Three

**Author's Note:** I just wanted to quickly address something a lot of people have been bringing up: the grading system. The way I take it, the O (Outstanding)-T grading system is for the OWLs and NEWTs as Harry isn't familiar with it before having it explained to him in OotP in reference to those tests (sort of like the SATs or AP tests, they're graded on a different scale). Their grades, then, must be based on a different scale, and though I'll freely admit I have no idea what scale British schools generally use, I chose to use the A-F grading system for their grades, not the O-T one because Harry's not taking either of the aforementioned tests in this fic. Hope that clears things up! I hope everyone enjoys this chapter and for the opportunity to get early future chapter, see the writing/art contest at my yahoo!group! (link on my profile).

Family Night

Part 3/5

After Snape's conversation, Hermione and Ron took their roles very seriously. Hermione nagged Harry about eating while Ron did the same about sleeping, and both had to ignore the annoyed looks Harry shot them each time.

But Harry began to look better; the effect was almost immediate. Soon, he had no circles under his eyes, his face looked less pale and he even looked as if he'd gained a little of the weight he'd lost since the previous year. Granted, he was still studying as much as he could during his free time, even at the dinner table, but at least he was getting sleep and food, and that took a bit of a weight off the shoulders of those looking over him.

It took Snape by surprise when Harry approached him to ask for Occlumency lessons once again, but agreed once Harry admitted he'd been having scar pains and strange dreams he couldn't exactly remember. They set up a schedule to meet three nights a week and this time around, Snape tried to aim for more neutral memories, not wanting to add any more stress to Harry's life at the moment.

It seemed to everyone that Harry might finally be on the road to healing from Lupin's inflicted damage.

OoOoOoOoO

Harry, shouldn't you be eating more?" Hermione pushed as usual, looking weary herself from trying to get Harry to eat like a normal person. Her friend didn't even look up from his Charms book, but pointedly took a bite. Unfortunately, he then just set his fork back down and Hermione and Ron exchanged a concerned glance.

"Mate, come on, we aren't bugging you about studying at the table, can't you just eat everything Hermione put on your plate?" Ron tried.

"It's too much," Harry said dismissively, turning the page. "It's not my fault she overloaded my plate."

"Harry, I put on less than Ron and I are eating, and you can't even finish that?" Hermione asked in a pleading sort of tone.

"I'm just not hungry tonight, okay? I'll make up for it later, after this exam," he said, tapping his book. He began muttering instructions on how to wave his wand while trying to actually duplicate the effect with his actual wand.

Ron let out a loud sigh of exasperation. "You always say that! There's always some exam; it's never over! You can't keep making excuses! I don't even know how you've gained weight since last quarter, it's not like you eat any more than you used to, you just do it in the Great Hall. And you still look like you're half-starved!"

Harry looked up from his textbook to glare at his friend. "Thanks Ron, but as much as I love being told how ugly I am, I really don't think it's any of your business."

"He's not saying you're ugly, Harry," Hermione said gently. "You're good-looking, you just look a bit unhealthy this year and we're worried because we know you look it for a reason."

Harry rolled his eyes and stabbed a piece of his food with his fork and reluctantly eating it. "Happy?" he asked in annoyance, putting his fork back down.

"No, I'm not!" Hermione said insistently. "You're still not eating enough! You're a teenage boy! You should be eating more than what's on your plate rather than barely any of it!"

"You're not my mother, Hermione," Harry snapped angrily, glaring at a group of third years who had been staring at their fight in interest. Their gazes immediately darted away from the trio.

"Well somebody should be since it's obvious you can't take care of yourself!" Hermione retorted heatedly.

"I've been taking care of myself my whole life, thank you," Harry growled.

"Harry," Hermione said quietly, more sympathetic now, "I understand that you really want a parental figure in your life, Merlin knows you deserve it, but this is too high a price. It's not worth this."

"What?" Harry asked defensively. "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm doing this because I want to be an Auror."

"Harry…" Hermione started, but Harry cut her off furiously.

"And what would you know about it anyway? You two and your perfect families, you can just sit there and tell me it's not worth it?" Harry barked bitterly. "Well you don't know anything because it's all just so easy for you two. Your parents are _always_ proud of you. Well, nobody's ever been proud of me, okay? So _excuse_ me for wanting for once in my life to know how that feels." He slammed his book closed and cradled it to his chest, standing up from the table.

"Harry," Hermione pleaded, voice tight with emotion. She reached for his hand, but Harry yanked it away.

"I have work to do," he said coldly and stalked out of the Great Hall.

Hermione and Ron exchanged a now familiar look; a hopeless one that communicated the obvious fact that neither had a clue of what to do.

OoOoOoOoO

That night, when Harry arrived for Occlumency training, Snape first sat him down for a cup of tea, watching with a raised eyebrow as Harry squirmed in his seat anxiously. He knew Harry was probably thinking of a thousand more useful things he could be doing with his time than sitting around drinking tea. It was obvious the Gryffindor had completely forgotten how to relax.

"What happened at dinner tonight?" Snape asked bluntly. Harry nearly dropped his cup.

"Nothing," Harry grumbled.

"You seem to be arguing with your friends quite a bit these days," Snape commented calmly.

Harry shrugged. "I told you it wasn't a good idea for me to eat with them," he said with only the slightest hint of accusation to his voice.

"Apparently it wasn't if it's not getting you to eat more. The bargain is changing," Snape said suddenly, knowing he'd regret his impulsive idea later. "Tomorrow evening you will join me in my quarters for dinner, and you will not be allowed any books at the table."

Harry looked at him aghast. "That's not fair. You can't keep this blackmail going forever!"

Snape looked at him sharply. "First of all, had any other professor found you intoxicated, you would have been given punishments much harsher than regularly eating and sleeping person and they would have handled it with much less discretion. Second, I am spending my own personal time to not only give you extra tutoring in Potions but also in Occlumency. I would think you would regard me with a little more gratitude."

Looking a bit shamed, Harry nodded. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. "That was really rude of me. Are you sure you'd want me as a dinner guest?" he asked insecurely.

"If it would ensure your eating of an entire meal, and that _is_ what you will be doing, then I won't object to your presence," Snape said, careful to sound indifferent. But at the flash of self-consciousness across Harry's face, he himself felt a flash of doubt, unsure playing indifferent was what he should be doing. But really, what else could he do?

OoOoOoOoO

Harry picked at his food, checking the clock. In the first few of his dinners with Snape, he had tried to wolf down his food in order to get back to studying sooner, so Snape had made it mandatory that he stay at least an hour. Yet while _he_ was not allowed schoolbooks at the table, apparently his professor was. Instead of relaxing as he was supposed to be doing, Harry couldn't help but feel anxious in the silence.

Snape looked up at the boy, and wondered if he should be talking to him. After all, he didn't look very relaxed. He had not had a dinner guest in a very long time, and those had always been about business. He wasn't sure how to go about entertaining company if he didn't have a set topic to address. During the last few meals, he had spoken to Harry about the only thing Snape had felt comfortable talking about with the boy: school. Harry had spoken eagerly about his classes, but it too soon turned to his grades rather than what he was learning. He had then fallen back on the one thing he himself could talk for hours about, but knowing Harry was only listening to his Potions talk in case Snape decided to use any of the material on a test put a damper on the conversation. He had thought it was perhaps better to have silence, but it was clear that wasn't working either. This was why he hadn't wanted to get involved with the teenager, it was obvious that he couldn't relate and was failing miserably with whatever it was he was supposed to be trying to do.

McGonagall had finally spoken with him about being worried about Harry. Apparently she had attempted to talk to Dumbledore about it, but didn't feel the headmaster truly understood the severity of what was going on, as he seemed to think it was good that Harry was going beyond the classroom so to better deal with Voldemort later. He had looked so stressed, that McGonagall hadn't pushed it with him, and had gone to Snape instead after Harry had mentioned during one of their tutoring sessions about having dinner with him.

Snape had responded with much sarcasm as to the amount of time it had taken her to notice, though he had to admit to himself that he had been trained in seeing things that other people couldn't. He had been relieved that McGonagall was finally seeing it though, so he could pass the problem onto her, where it should be, but to his frustration, McGonagal seemed to think that Snape was the best person to handle it since Harry had "clearly developed a trusting relationship" with him. Snape was sure she'd gotten into some catnip somewhere, it was all completely ridiculous. But though he had scowled and sneered and even refused when she announced that she believed the best course of action was to continue having Harry over for dinners on occasion, he still found himself demanding the boy come every time he saw Harry ignore his plate in the Great Hall for a few days. He was disgusted with himself for acting so Hufflepuffish, but just could not sit by and watch the boy slowly kill himself.

"How was your day?" he asked suddenly, causing Harry to start lightly and blink in surprise.

"My day?"

Snape rolled his eyes. "No, Potter, I was addressing your dinner plate," he responded sarcastically.

"It was fine. How was yours?" the Gryffindor replied cautiously.

For some reason, Snape hadn't quite expected the question to be returned and found himself slightly taken aback. After all, nobody had asked him that for a long time. "Average," he said curtly.

Harry looked at him curiously, bored enough to actually pose the questions he was thinking. "What exactly _is_ your average day? What do you do besides teach and intimidate people? Not that that doesn't sound like a thrilling day…"

Snape fixed him with a glare and Harry ducked his head, taking another bite of his food. He didn't look afraid, however; he simply seemed resigned that his questions would go unanswered.

"Well it appears as if my intimidation is losing its touch if you are bold enough to make such comments," he commented with a raised eyebrow. Harry looked up in surprise and his expression soon turned slightly amused.

"Oh, no, it's not, I promise," Harry assured him. "Still very intimidating."

"You haven't appeared very afraid of me lately, Potter," Snape challenged casually. "Perhaps I'm going to soft on you and your classmates. I believe I may have to be a bit more harsh on your class to assure that I don't lose my touch."

"No really, there's no need," Harry jumped in with a slight smirk. "We all still dread your class and are well aware that each time we step into your classroom our morale, self-esteem and dignity will be chipped away at, sir. Really, I only act like I'm not afraid as a defense mechanism. It's necessary for my psychological survival, or so I've heard," Harry said with an amused grin. He watched Snape carefully when he was done, as if trying to see if he'd pushed things too far.

"Is that so?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

Harry nodded. "Of course. No need to worry, Professor. There are probably Hufflepuffs wetting their pants right now just thinking of your class."

"Thank you for the reassurance, Potter, though that last image crossed a line into disturbing," Snape said evenly, sipping his wine.

As the two fell into silence again, Harry's expression turned into a desolate one.

Snape cleared his throat awkwardly, trying rapidly to think of a non-grade related question. He would have asked about Quidditch, but he had heard that Harry had quit the team earlier in the year and didn't want to depress the boy more. Besides, that line of questioning would most certainly lead back to his marks, as it was no mystery that he had quit to be able to use the time for studying. Harry was angry with his friends so even that was an undesirable choice for conversation.

"I'd imagine you'd be eager for the year to end," Snape commented.

"Depends. Hopefully Remus'll be taking me in and I won't be going back to the Dursleys. That'd be great," Harry said with a surge of excitement.

Snape cursed himself for ending up on that topic. He nodded distractedly.

"What about you, Professor?"

Once again Snape wondered at Harry's apparent indoctrinated politeness. He was fairly certain that most teenagers felt the world revolved around them that they could not be bothered to be curious about anyone else. He wasn't sure if this proposed interest was born of a constant effort to turn attention away from himself, his relative's insistences that he wasn't as important as others, genuine interest or something else. Whatever the reason, it was disconcerting, especially because people were supposed to be mortally afraid of the harsh Potions master.

"A break from teenagers who would rather whisper about the latest mundane gossip than pay attention enough not to blow up my Potions classroom? What do you think, Potter?"

"Why even teach then?' Harry asked, a bit exasperatedly.

Snape could not count the number of times he had asked himself that same question.

"I suppose I find entertainment in torturing students," he said with an evil smirk.

"No kidding," Harry muttered.

"What was that, Potter?" Snape asked knowingly.

Harry ignored the question and adopted a thoughtful look as he chewed his food. "_I_ think you're still hoping to find students who are interested in Potions and talented enough to be worthy of your teaching, so you can mold them into the next big names in Potions. I think you may be an eternal optimist, sir," Harry said with an apologetic shrug.

"Don't count on it, Potter. And don't speak with food in your mouth. It's distasteful."

Harry swallowed pointedly.

"Good," Snape nodded. "If you gain nothing else from these meals, I hope you will at least learn some basic table manners."

"See?" Harry asked, making sure to swallow his food beforehand. "Eternal optimist."

A stern glare met a cheeky grin.

OoOoOoOoO

Dinners continued awkwardly for awhile, as the two didn't really know what to say to each other, but after a while, they began to relax and became less reluctant to talk about mundane things such as what had happened that day, Snape's potions research, Harry's homework and other such topics that got them through dinner. Harry became increasingly interested in Snape's personal life, but Snape truthfully admitted there wasn't much to tell. Harry tried to make him feel better by admitting that his summers were spent doing chores and trying not to get beat up by Dudley's gang.

They were both a little disconcerted that they got on so well with each other, as it shattered a few belief systems both had thought were rock solid.

But Snape became increasingly worried as Harry seemed more and more exhausted, and surreptitiously asked Ron if Harry was going to bed on time, and Ron insisted he was.

But both suspected something wasn't right.

OoOoOoOoO

Ron groaned and looked at his clock.

"Three bloody A.M.," he grumbled as he slipped out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom.

It was on his way back to bed when he noticed something was off. On a hunch, he peaked through the crack in Harry's bed curtains, and then threw them back completely, sighing in disappointment at the empty bed.

"I should have known," he muttered to himself. He angrily stalked over to Harry's trunk to search for the Marauder's Map, but it looked like Harry had taken it with him. It didn't matter, though; Ron was pretty certain where Harry had gone.

He threw on his cloak and angrily made his way toward the Room of Requirement, not running into anyone along the way. After all, it was even past time for those patrolling the hallways to be out.

After hurriedly walking past the door three times, he yanked it open. He watched as Harry jumped and looked at him with a startled, guilty look. Ron entered and slammed the door behind him, causing Harry to wince.

"You've been doing this every night, haven't you?" Ron asked angrily. "Fooling me into thinking you were sleeping and then sneaking off to study. Do you realize how ridiculous this is?"

"Look, Ron, I have a test tomorrow and two essays due. Plus, I was supposed to look over chapter thirty-three for my Transfiguration tutoring session tomorrow…"

"I don't care!" Ron yelled. "I don't care about your bloody grades, Harry! Look what it's doing to you! You have no appetite because you're too stressed over whether you've finally got a higher grade in Potions than Malfoy or because you can't see anything in the damn crystal ball in Divination! And obviously you're not sleeping! And you never make any time for me or Hermione, you'd rather spend your time with your stupid books and notes! And where has it gotten you, Harry? Has it been worth it?"

"Sure it has. I have a much better chance of getting into the Auror program…"

"Enough with the damn Auror program! Who are you trying to kid!" Ron snapped. "We both know this isn't about the stupid Auror program."

Harry glared at him, as if Ron had just personally insulted him by not playing along with his game.

"I don't know what to do anymore," Ron said, shaking his head. "You're my best friend, Harry, but you've gotten completely out of control. I'm going to have to tell Snape about this."

Harry's eyes widened and he jumped out of his seat. "You can't! He'll tell Remus…" he cut himself off before he revealed the events of last Family Night. It seemed as if Fred and George had kept what happened to themselves and Harry didn't particularly want his friends to know he'd gone off and gotten plastered with Draco Malfoy.

"Tell him what, Harry?" Ron asked with a humorless laugh. "That you don't have the top grades in one of your classes? That you got less than a hundred and ten percent on a test? Who cares what Remus bloody Lupin thinks? That man is messed up as far as I am concerned."

"He is not! Just shut up," Harry shouted. "I don't say mean things about your family so lay off mine!"

"So now Remus is your family?" Ron asked incredulously. "How can you think that, Harry? You never told us what his excuse for not showing up for the last Family Night was. That's the third one he's ditched you on!"

Harry looked as if he'd been slapped and to Ron's horror, he could tell Harry was trying not to cry. "Things came up," he lied, not meeting Ron's eyes. "But he's coming to this next one."

"You're not serious. You can't actually think that, Harry! Just forget about him! My family…"

"Your family can follow us around and pretend like they give a rat's ass about anything _I_ did! I'm not a charity case, Ron, I don't need your pity!" Harry yelled and Ron felt an odd sense of irony as if the tables had flipped. It was odd to think they both were worried about their friends treating them as a charity case, though in such different ways. "Come on, Ron, don't tell Snape. It's not that big of a deal and I won't do it again."

Harry had always been a bad liar and Ron was angry that he would make false promises to Ron's face.

"And then you'll just wait until I'm asleep and sneak off again. I can't keep an eye on you all the time, Harry, and I just don't know what to do so I'm going to let Snape know and hope he has an idea of how to get through to you."

"God, Ron, you're not my fucking babysitter!" Harry snapped furiously. "Why don't you mind your own damn business for once in your life! I thought you were supposed to be my friend!"

"I'm doing this _because_ I'm your friend. And you know, Harry, I thought you were supposed to be _my_ best friend but frankly, I don't even know who you are anymore. What happened to the Harry who used to procrastinate on homework with me and do half-arsed jobs on it? What happened to the Harry who used to be satisfied with just slightly better than average grades? What happened to the Harry I used to have fun with, who I could talk to and just hang out with?" Ron asked desperately.

"He realized he wasn't normal like his friends and that unlike them, he couldn't keep arsing around anymore because not taking anything seriously was only getting him into trouble," Harry said coldly.

"Yeah? Well I liked the old Harry better," Ron said darkly. "I just hope you'll come to your senses soon and realize who you really are."

"What? A loser?" Harry asked harshly.

"No, my best friend. If you see him around, tell him I'm looking for him," Ron said, sounding tired in a way that wasn't attributed to the early hour. "Better get in all the studying you want because I'm telling Snape tomorrow."

He turned toward the door, but was froze when Harry desperately pleaded for him to wait.

"Please Ron," he begged shakily. "Please, I'll do anything. Don't tell him. I won't do it again. I'll give you my word I won't sneak out again. And…and I'll give you my Firebolt."

Ron whipped around to face his friend, completely stunned. "You love your Firebolt," he said in slight horror.

"You can have it," Harry said, eyes filled with desperation.

"Sirius gave it to you," Ron reminded him, as if Harry could have possibly forgotten that fact.

Harry took in a shuddering breath and nodded. "I know. But he's not here anymore. But Remus _is_ here and he's all I've got. If you tell Snape it'll ruin everything. Please Ron, you've always liked my Firebolt, right? I'll never even ask to borrow it. It'll be all yours."

"I'm not taking your Firebolt," Ron said, having a difficult time believing Harry was actually trying to bribe him with something that held such sentimental value, but really, what else could he have bribed him with? Everything Harry owned of monetary value held an even greater sentimental value. Harry just wasn't the type to spend his money on expensive things, and it would be awkward to offer Ron money, though Ron was starting to think Harry wouldn't be above that either. "Okay, if you come back to bed right now and swear to me, and I mean give me your word as my best friend, that you will never sneak out to study in the middle of the night again, I won't tell Snape."

Harry looked as though he might cry with relief. "Thank you. Thank you, Ron. You don't know what that means. I'll buy you the best birthday present ever. Just tell me what you want, anything, I swear."

"Obviously, you don't know me much anymore either," Ron said with a glare. "All I want from you is your word."

Harry nodded and reluctantly swore he would never sneak out again at night.

OoOoOoOoO

Yet Harry's exhaustion during the day didn't cease and Ron was constantly worried Harry had broken his word. He set his alarm for various times during the night and checked the Marauder's Map, which Harry had forfeited to him for the express purpose of allowing Ron to easily make sure Harry was keeping his word. There were never any lights coming from Harry's bed curtains. Ron wondered if Harry was lying in bed at night going over facts in his head, but there wasn't much he could do about that save hope Harry's exhaustion would finally catch up with him and he'd eventually get used to sleeping at night.

But he and Hermione both felt something was off, and it was because of that they decided to see what they could find. They would never have invaded their friend's privacy under normal circumstances, but they were worried and at their wits end.

Therefore, while Harry was off studying as usual, the two guiltily began going through his things, not even sure of what they were looking for.

It didn't take them long before Ron found something.

"They're letters from Remus," Ron said, rifling through the very few pieces of paper. The two sat side by side on the edge of Harry's bed, reading through the letters in increasing horror.

"Merlin, listen to this," Hermione said in disgust, reading off a passage, "_Harry, how can you ask me to forgive you for causing the death of my best friend when you haven't even tried to make up for what you did? When you can prove to me that you're making up for the lack of effort you put into your Occlumency last year, then I will come to this Family Night affair. If you actually focus on learning this year, perhaps you can cease being the cause of death and begin to prevent it._"

"Yeah, in this latest one he's basically told Harry that what he did last quarter wasn't good enough and if he really wants to prove he's sorry, he'll learn Occlumency too. And listen to this: _This quarter, I'd really like to see you work. No more slacking off. You would have wanted your parents to be proud of you, wouldn't you?_" Ron read off in a deadly tone. He wanted to go kill Remus for doing this right then and there. "He said he didn't show up for last Family Night because he realized Harry wasn't really proving himself. Bloody hell, no wonder…"

"What the hell are you two doing!" came an enraged voice. Hermione and Ron froze as they stared guiltily up at Harry who snatched the letters from their hands.

"I thought you were supposed to be studying," Ron said stupidly.

"Yeah, until the charms that let me know if people are going through my drawers went off! I thought it would be Colin or someone rooting around in there! I can't believe you two! I thought you were supposed to be my friends!" Harry yelled, looking betrayed. "These are my personal things! How could you just go through them and read my letters!"

"We just wanted to know what was going on, Harry!" Hermione yelled. "You don't talk to us anymore. When we ask, you brush us off. How were we supposed to find out otherwise?"

"It's none of your business anyway!" Harry screamed.

"It _is_ our business because you're our best friend and we're worried sick about you!" Ron shouted.

"_Friends_ respect each other. They don't go through each other's things! Drop the whole friendship pretense and own up to why you were really going through my stuff!"

"Harry, don't be stupid, it's not a pretense. You're our friend!" Ron insisted.

"God, haven't I made it clear? You don't _have_ to be my friends anymore!" Harry yelled wildly.

The two looked at him incredulously.

"What do you mean _have_ to be your friends'?" Hermione asked in a frightened tone.

"I know you guys are letting me stick around because Snape asked you to keep an eye on me and because you think I can't take care of myself, but I can so you don't have to let me tag along anymore or pretend to care," Harry said, sounding angry, upset and lost at the same time.

"Harry, no…" Hermione started, tears forming in her eyes, but Harry cut her off by flinging the papers at them.

"Fine, you know what? Fine. You want to read them so bad, go ahead. You can report back to Snape and be done with your little task; I don't care," he said, sounding so weary that Hermione actually did begin to cry. "I have to get to Occlumency lessons, now and when I come back, you better be done because I don't ever want to talk to you again."

Harry practically ran from the room, and Hermione and Ron were left terrified that they may have just lost their best friend.

OoOoOoOoO

Snape opened the door and immediately turned worried as he saw Harry. He let the boy by, watching him closely. Harry was obviously quite upset about something.

"Potter…"

"Professor Snape?" he asked, almost frantically. "Can I ask you a favor?"

"You may ask though I may not grant your request," Snape answered, watching warily as the boy fought to control his emotions.

"Please," he begged. "I just…before we start lessons for tonight, can you just look at a happy memory of mine so I can see it? Not try to Occlude, just see it?"

Snape was surprised by the plea and more than a little disturbed by it. It seemed as though Harry was falling into a depression of sorts if he couldn't remember his happy memories for himself.

"Do you have a particular one in mind?" he asked vaguely, not yet answering the appeal.

Harry nodded. "When Remus was teaching me to do the Patronus and he was saying he was proud of me," he beseeched, his desperation outweighing his embarrassment for the request.

Snape frowned. That was definitely not what Harry needed right now, a reminder of what it was like for Lupin to be proud of him. He didn't want it to set Harry off in an even greater determination to gain Lupin's approval.

"I'll let you indulge in a pleasant memory, but I will choose which one," Snape bargained.

Harry looked as if he was about to argue but changed his mind and nodded with a bit of disappointment.

Snape led him to a chair and looked into the wide emerald eyes. _So full of pain_, he thought but shooed his sympathy away.

"Legilimens."

He quickly found what he was looking for, something much better to remind Harry of.

_Ron and Harry were sitting near the fire in the Gryffindor common room, laughing as they ate sweets and played chess. To mix the game up a bit, they had designated each chess piece as a person they knew so the game became a challenge to not only win, but to save the people they liked and get rid of the ones they didn't. _

"_I should sacrifice my knight, but that's me," Ron muttered as he deliberated his next move. _

"_Uh oh, Ron, you better watch out," Harry laughed. "Millicent Bullstrode is right behind you," he said, pointing to the white bishop near Ron's black knight. "I think she's going to ask you on a date."_

_Ron made a face and quickly tried to figure out any way of getting his piece out of there, even if it meant ruining his game. _

"_You two should really be studying rather than playing silly games," Hermione scolded them lightly._

"_Well, Hermione just got sacrificed to Malfoy," Ron declared and set his queen up to be taken, even if it was sudden death for his chances of winning._

_At Hermione's indignant look, Harry and Ron began laughing._

Snape was taken aback when Harry pushed him from his mind.

"They're not my friends anymore," Harry said in a defeated tone.

"What happened?" Snape asked in concern.

"I'm sure they'll tell you all about it, but I, for one, would rather spend my time learning to keep Voldemort out of my head than relive stupid fights." He stood, looking frighteningly deadened. "I'm not eating in the Great Hall anymore. I'll get food from the kitchens."

That certainly caught Snape by surprise. "We agreed…"

"We agreed I'd eat with my friends. Well I don't have any friends so it shouldn't matter where I eat."

"This is not a negotiation, Potter."

"If you tell Remus, I'll just say you're lying and that you're trying to keep me from my studies," Harry said regretfully. "Look, Professor, I don't want to get on your bad side, but I just can't eat in there anymore. I'd really like to continue Occlumency with you, but I could go to Dumbledore for lessons if you decide not to."

"You will eat dinner with me then," Snape decided.

"You can't, remember? You said last time that you were getting close to making that potion you're inventing for the Order to work and didn't have time for Occlumency _and _a sit-down dinner. I'd rather have the Occlumency and eat dinner on my own." Snape frowned in frustration and Harry continued. "Look, _you're_ busy; _I'm_ busy. I'll eat, really I will, but don't turn dinnertime into something we both resent," Harry reasoned.

Snape looked at him sternly. "If I find you're not eating, and I will know if you're not, Potter, there will be hell to pay, understand?"

"Understood."

OoOoOoOoO

Harry tried to find time to eat, but when he did get food, his stomach was already churning with panic over some test or assignment, that he couldn't get much down. He had also found some charms that allowed him to have a light in his bed but not have it shine through the curtains for Ron to see when he woke up to check on him. He also had a charm that would allow him to know if Ron was coming to physically see him instead of relying on the map. Despite how angry he was at Ron, he still felt that at least he was technically keeping his promise. He had not snuck _out_ to go study since Ron asked him not to…he'd been doing it in bed. After their fight, he told Ron to bugger off and leave him alone, but also didn't want him telling Snape he hadn't been sleeping much.

He'd been using the concealment charms for a while now, and they worked to cover up the dark splotches under his eyes and the pinched look to his cheeks. When he'd first realized how thin his face was beginning to look, and that his clothes were fitting him more loosely than usual, he'd tried to eat more, but the result of forcing down food when he was so insanely nervous about exams and papers was that he would just throw it back up. He only had a few weeks left. He could make up for it during the summer. Because if he did all this, Remus would surely take him in and then he'd be able to eat as much as he wanted. Remus would probably be concerned for him and make sure he gained the weight back and that would be really nice.

The nights began to sort of blend into the days as he began to feel weak and tired all the time. He had a bit of a scare when he went to go owl Remus on his progress and later awoke in the secret passage he used to get there with a bump on his head and his last memory being of just walking along. At first he thought he'd been attacked, but when it happened again a few days later, he realized it was because he was so exhausted he'd passed out, injuring himself in the fall. After that, he meant to schedule in more time for sleep, but never seemed to get around to it, always telling himself he'd make up for the sleep he was missing the next day.

Ron and Hermione were devastated that he wouldn't speak to them anymore. Hermione nearly burst into tears whenever she saw him and Ron had adopted a perpetual look of worry and distress. They both believed that Harry was falling apart, but since Harry actually looked better than he had in awhile, they didn't have anything to back up their suspicions.

Harry was irritable and tired and he'd developed a nasty cough that made his throat and lungs burn horribly, so he found himself snapping at anyone who tried to talk to him for too long about anything non-school related. Everyone backed off and left him to his solitary ways, except for Hermione and Ron who kept coming back no matter what he screamed at them.

"Harry, you should go to the hospital wing," Hermione told him, when she and Ron ambushed him in the library. "You don't seem well."

"Bugger off," Harry growled at them. "If you're looking for entertainment, why don't you go look through the rest of my stuff? And hey, there's three other innocent victims in my dorm room you could spy on."

"Harry, please," Hermione begged tearfully.

Harry stood up quickly and gathered up his things. He started for the door but felt a wave of dizziness and fatigue and had to steady himself against a bookshelf.

"Harry!" the two yelled simultaneously, racing over to him. By the time they reached him he had composed himself.

"If you'll excuse me, I have Occlumency lessons," Harry said, head held high as he marched passed the two of them, hearing Hermione burst into tears once again as he started toward the dungeons.

OoOoOoOoO

Snape looked at Harry warily as the boy entered the classroom looking dead on his feet, wand drawn in a hand that shook slightly even when resting at his side.

"Potter, take the day off," he said, but Harry shook his head, looking almost scared of the thought.

"Please, Professor, can we just do this for a bit? I really want to show some improvement in this in case Voldemort tries to invade my thoughts again," Harry pleaded.

Snape knew he was lying by now. He was annoyed with himself that he had believed Harry's stories about his scar hurting in the first place. He knew why the Gryffindor wanted to learn Occlumency as soon as possible. The fourth and final Family Night was looming ahead and Harry was determined to do something that would get Remus to come even if it killed him. But he worried that if he ended these lessons, he would lose the "trusting relationship" McGonagall insisted he had with Harry. He didn't fool himself into thinking Harry trusted him implicitly, but he admitted that he was closer to getting through to the boy than anyone else at the moment, not that that was saying much.

Against his better judgment, Snape nodded and stood face to face with Harry. The emerald eyes shut as Harry attempted to clear his mind, something that Snape knew must be hard for someone who was as stressed as Harry was.

When Harry indicated that he was ready and opened his eyes, Snape raised his wand. But at the sight of the slight glassiness of the emerald orbs that had nothing to do with meditation and everything to do with sleep deprivation, Snape couldn't do it. As he lowered his wand, Harry looked at him incredulously.

"Please, sir, I can't practice on my own. I can't push myself out of my own mind!" he protested.

"I think you already have, Potter, and that's the problem. Look at you! This is a shell," Snape barked, gesturing at Harry. "You're dead on your feet, you've distanced yourself from your friends, you've lost interest in everything you used to enjoy, all you do is study."

Harry glared at him. "Isn't that what teachers are supposed to want? Look, my grades…"

"What do grades matter when you're killing yourself? Merlin, Potter, have you seen yourself in a mirror?"

"I don't care!" Harry shouted. "Remus will only come if…"

"Gods, Potter, he's not going to come! Open your eyes! The man has lost it and is taking his anger and resentment out on you even though you do not deserve it. It's disgusting and why you go for such lengths for such a pathetic excuse for a person, I cannot fathom!" Snape snarled.

"He's going to come," Harry said, sounding a little more unsure of himself. "He'll forgive me and he'll come."

And Snape finally understood. This wasn't only about Harry wanting desperately for a parental figure to acknowledge him and take pride in him. This was about forgiveness. He was using Remus as an indicator to see if he could forgive himself, and Remus wasn't allowing Harry to do that. If Remus forgave Harry enough to come to this Family Night, only then would Harry be able to stop blaming himself for what had happened to his godfather. That was one reason why Harry was trying so hard, because the guilt was eating him alive.

"Potter, sit down, we need to talk," Snape said seriously.

Harry stood there, putting one hand to his head dizzily. "He's going to come, you'll see. I just have to learn Occlumency and get top marks. He'll….he'll come…"

His other hand shot out to try to grab onto something as his head swam, but there was nothing there to grab onto.

"Potter?" Snape asked worriedly. He darted forward and grabbed Harry just as the boy's legs gave out. He sank with the boy to the ground, cradling his upper body in his lap as he tried to keep Harry conscious. "Potter. Potter! When was the last time you ate anything? Hell, when was the last time you slept?" he asked urgently.

"He'll come," Harry whispered before going limp in Snape's arms.

As soon as he lost consciousness, it was obvious that he'd been using glamours to disguise his appearance as the charms ended, revealing dark circles under his eyes, a frightening, unnatural paleness to his complexion and a weight decrease that was truly worrisome.

Snape cursed and scooped the now horrendously light boy into his arms. Thinking of the hoards of students roaming the halls, he hurried into his office and awkwardly managed to light a fire with his wand and get a pinch of floo powder into it. Cradling the Gryffindor against his chest as best he could, he flooed to the Hospital Wing.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

**A/N: **If I didn't have at least one chapter ending with Harry unconscious, it just wouldn't be a Celebony fic, hahaha. Please Review!


	4. Part Four

Part 4

Snape nearly groaned as he saw Madam Pomfrey giving Neville Longbottom some potion that was obviously meant to get rid of the patches of purple skin he'd somehow managed to spell himself with.

"For Merlin's sake, what's he gotten himself into this time?" Madam Pomfrey asked, flustered and worried at the same time. Snape gingerly laid Harry on a hospital bed.

"Longbottom, fetch Granger and Weasley and don't tell anyone else of what you saw here, understand?" Snape asked with a threatening glare that had Neville nodding in fright and running out the door.

As soon as the boy left, Snape explained his suspicions to the medi-witch, who began asking him questions he didn't know the answer to, but hoped the two Gryffindor students he'd summoned would.

Soon, the two burst through the door, slightly out of breath and looking extremely worried.

"Harry?" Hermione asked emotionally in seeing her friend pale and unconscious. "What happened to him?"

"Can either of you tell me about Mr. Potter's recent eating and sleeping patterns?" Madam Pomfrey asked urgently as she checked over the raven-haired boy.

"Well, I've been trying to make sure he's sleeping, but I've been suspecting for awhile he's figured some way around it. I know he'd rather study than sleep," Ron informed her, obviously distressed. "And he doesn't come to meals either. I know he sometimes picks up food from the kitchens or one of us will bring him back something, but it's hard to tell how much of it he's been eating since he's sort of pushed us away. What's happened to him?"

"He's run himself into the ground, it appears. His health is in an appalling state. He has signs of anemia and his blood sugar's frighteningly low. He's lost a lot of weight since the last time he's been in here and he was underweight to begin with. His body's showing obvious signs of fatigue and from the looks of it, he's been consuming pretty much nothing but caffeine, probably in the form of coffee. He's been running off artificial energy and it's taken its toll. Why didn't anyone report this to me? He's dangerously underweight and one can just tell by looking at him that he's not doing well!" she said accusingly.

Hermione began to silently cry as Ron felt a wave of guilt. "He didn't look like this, I swear!" he protested.

"He was using glamour charms to conceal his appearance," Snape informed the nurse. "They ended when he lost consciousness."

"Every time we tried to talk to him about it, he'd get angry and push us away even more. We got into some rows and we just haven't been seeing too much of him outside of class," Ron said blankly, not even sure who he was talking to. "I didn't think it was this bad! I thought he was eating and napping when he was out. We tried but he wouldn't listen to anything we had to say!"

"Will he be alright?" Hermione asked in a near-whisper.

Madam Pomfrey sighed. "Well he's showing signs of a decreased lymphocyte responsivity to mitogens and decreased lymphocyte cytotoxicity." At the blank looks she was receiving, she remembered whom she was speaking to. "It means his immune system functioning has been compromised. He also seems to have developed a slight respiratory tract infection, which is a common effect of sleep deprivation…"

"Because of the decrease in natural killer cell activity?" Hermione asked. Everyone gave her a surprised look. "I've been reading up on sleep deprivation and stress," she explained. "I read that stress can play a factor in eating disorders. Harry's so thin and he never seems hungry, do you think…" she trailed off nervously.

Thankfully, Madam Pomfrey shook her head. "I don't think that's the case. Some people respond to stress by eating more, some by eating less. Stress can suppress the psychological cues of hunger, so he probably really has just been too stressed and honestly doesn't feel hungry. His suppression of hunger seems even more acute than normal; I'd guess it's probably linked to how he was raised, perhaps?"

"His family used to practically starve him for punishments," Ron put in reluctantly. He didn't want to betray Harry's trust, but he wanted Madam Pomfrey to know any information that might help her help Harry. "In his second year, my brothers and I had to go rescue him because they'd locked him in his room and were giving him about one can of cold soup a day to split between him and his owl."

Snape stared at Ron in disbelief. It seemed Harry was better at Occlumency than he'd thought as he'd never seen a memory that suggested that sort of thing. He suddenly realized it was very possible that Harry's difficulties in keeping Snape from accessing certain memories was because he was already trying to block others and hadn't yet learned how to spread his focus.

Madam Pomfrey nodded darkly. "I wondered if that was the case."

The mediwitch retreated into her office as they heard her name being called through the floo. Harry's two best friends sat on either side of his bed, Hermione taking his hand in hers as she gazed down at the unconscious teenager.

"It's just not fair," she said emotionally, stroking the back of Harry's hand with her thumb. "Everyone seems to think that just because Harry's supposed to be some savior he doesn't need someone just as much as the rest of us. Hell, he probably needs a parental figure _more_ than a lot of us with all the stuff he has to go through." She wiped away a rebellious tear and blinked away any more. "Yet, no matter what he does, he just can't get one. He'd do anything for it and it's never good enough."

Snape knew how that felt. His father had never been impressed no matter what Snape tried to do to please him. That was one of the many reasons he'd hated James Potter, who simply had his parents' love no matter what he did. It was just unfair. The irony that he related so well to James Potter's son was not lost on him.

"He has my family," Ron put in. "Mum adores him and Fred and George think of him as a little brother…"

"It's not enough," Hermione interrupted with a sigh. "He's been taught to feel as if he was intruding on the Dursleys, and it would be nearly impossible to ever feel like he belongs in your family, Ron, as much as he loves you guys. I just don't know what to do. We can't get that for him. What if he continues on like this? We'll lose him."

Madam Pomfrey hurried from her office, looking rather flustered.

"Lupin's in the castle," she announced gravely.

"What? You can't let him near Harry," Ron said angrily.

"Thank you, Mr. Weasley," the mediwitch snapped sarcastically, "I'm well aware of that. I'm restricting access for visitors for Harry. So time's up, you two. You'll be able to see your friend later."

Hermione's and Ron's protests stood no match against Madam Pomfrey's orders.

Once the couple was shoved out, Snape turned to the elder woman, who was pulling curtains around Harry's bed.

"Poppy, you know it will be quite difficult to keep Lupin from Potter if he's truly intent on seeing the boy. It isn't as if you can shut off the hospital wing from anyone who claims injury."

"Yes, Severus, but what do you expect me to do?" Madam Pomfrey asked irritably.

"Let me take him," Snape said quickly before he could change his mind.

"You want my permission to fight Remus Lupin?" Madam Pomfrey asked in confusion.

"No, you blasted woman," Snape said incredulously.

"Sorry, Severus, you must remember I deal with many teenage fight victims who just want to get in one last punch, insisting they could '_take 'em_'," she said in disapproval. Before she could go on a rant about kids these days, Snape clarified what he had meant in the first place.

"I meant Potter. He can stay in my guestroom until he recovers," he said with as much dignity as possible while facing the floored look on the nurse's face.

"You want to take care of Harry?" she asked, giving him a searching look as if trying to determine if he'd been drugged or enchanted.

"He'd be safe from Lupin in my rooms and his current situation would be better hid from others. It would do no good if it got out that the Boy Who Lived had a breakdown," he reasoned, somewhat dodging the question.

Madam Pomfrey looked at him warily. "He'd need to be cared for. He's ill and that would require attention."

Snape glared at her. "Poppy, are you under the impression that I would neglect an ill child? Do you believe I plan to shove him in a storage cupboard and leave him there for a week unattended or something? As a skilled Potions master I am well-versed in healing and am perfectly able to follow any instructions you may give, and I would never neglect a child in my care. I'll thank you to remember that next time you imply I'd be an unfit caretaker," he said harshly.

Madam Pomfrey looked as if she were having an internal debate on the subject when the door opened to reveal Remus Lupin.

"I need to speak with Harry," he said coldly.

"I'm not permitting visitors at this time," Madam Pomfrey said.

"I'm the closest thing he has to a guardian and I need to speak with him," Lupin insisted, casting glares at the closed curtains around Harry's hospital bed. He looked to Snape, assumingly for sympathy as he obviously remembered the professor's notorious hatred for the boy, but Snape fixed Remus with his most deadly glare.

"And I say no. He is resting and he's been through a very rough time lately…"

"Harry is being selfish and dramatic," Remus cut in angrily. "We are in a war and he is in a position to save or destroy lives. He thinks he's having a rough time lately? Why doesn't he ask Sirius about what a rough time is? Or Cedric Diggory? Or his parents who died for him? Only more people are going to die if he doesn't do something to stop it and he doesn't even care!"

"He's a boy, Remus," Madam Pomfrey said sternly.

"A boy who's getting people killed with his indifference," Remus growled. "He's the Boy Who Lived and like it or not the people around him are going to die if he doesn't get his act together. Severus, you agree with me, don't you?"

"You disgust me, Lupin. Doing this to a child? You're despicable," Snape responded darkly.

Lupin glared at him ferociously. "You're just glad he got Sirius killed, aren't you? You've always hated Sirius so you've finally sided with Harry."

"_Harry_ is just a boy and cannot be held responsible for the events of last year, you deluded moron. You want to blame someone? Blame Bellatrix Lestrange. Blame Voldemort. Don't blame a boy who's as devastated over the loss of the man as you are!" Snape growled at him.

"Harry is a selfish brat who can't think of anyone but himself. If he had put a stitch of effort and thought into his actions last year, Sirius would still be alive!" Remus yelled wildly.

"OUT!" Madam Pomfrey bellowed furiously.

"I'm not leaving without giving Harry a piece of my mind!"

"We'll discuss this in the hallway," Madam Pomfrey said dangerously, shoving Remus out the door. Before she closed the door behind her to deal with Remus, she turned to Snape and nodded meaningfully.

"Severus, go ahead with what we were discussing. You may use the Floo in my office and I'll send you further instructions at a later time"

As soon as the door shut, Snape gathered up the potions bottles next to Harry's bed, slipping them in his pockets. Slipping one arm under Harry's knees and the other behind his back, he lifted the small teenager into his arms and cradled the limp boy against his chest. As the yelling in the hall grew more heated, he hurried to the fireplace, silently cursing Remus Lupin to hell.

I……………….I

When Harry became aware, the first thing he noticed was how comfortable he was. His stomach ached with a hollow sort of pain and his every breath sent sharp pangs through his chest, but the bed he was in was soft and warm. The pillow was the perfect thickness and the sheets felt heavenly against his skin. He felt the reassuring weight of a comforter on top of him and instead of worrying where he was, he merely hoped he didn't have to leave.

He tried to remember the date, praying it was a weekend while knowing it was not.

_Wednesday_, the day floated through his mind. _Double Transfiguration: nothing due, no test. Care of Magical Creatures: nothing due, no test. Potions: nothing due…"_

Harry's eyes flew open and he bolted upright in bed. He couldn't remember studying for his Potions test!

He was just noticing how swimmy his mind felt when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He jumped and jolted in surprise when he realized who the hand belonged to.

"'Fessor Sape?" he slurred groggily. "D'I miss Potions?"

Snape shook his head with a frown. "No, Potter. You're not going to be going to Potions for a while. Go back to sleep. You shouldn't be up with sleeping potions in your syst…"

"I hafta," Harry protested, eyes falling shut and wrenching back open again. "There's a test on chapper…uh…five hundred, six thousand, two thousand and three," he said with conviction, noticing how odd it was that everything felt so…fuzzy.

Snape actually looked quite amused at that, much to Harry's confusion.

"We haven't covered that chapter quite yet," he assured Potter. "And don't worry about the test. It's all done for now."

Suddenly, there was a glass at Harry's lips and a gentle hand on the back of his head.

"Drink a bit of this…that's it Potter, good job."

Harry smiled at that as the glass disappeared.

"Good job?" he asked, nearly tearful with happiness. "Thank you, I've been trying so hard all year."

"Yes, and you've done more than enough."

Harry's eyes drooped heavily and he allowed himself to be pushed back onto his pillows. "Since I did good can you take me 'way from Dursleys now? We can live 'gether, Remy, and I'll be so so so so so good," he muttered sleepily.

"We'll talk about it when you wake," Snape said vaguely.

Harry nodded in exhaustion. "Can you tell the owners of this hotel I can't be kidnapped on Friday? I have an essay due for five billion feet," he mumbled.

Snape pulled the covers up to Harry's chin.

"I'll let them know."

I……………….I

The next time Harry woke, he was very aware of his surroundings, wondering where the hell he was. It was a decently sized room, and the bed he was on was incredibly comfortable. The décor rather reminded him of Snape's chambers, but he couldn't possibly be…

The door opened to reveal Snape entering with a tray of food.

"How are you feeling?" he asked. Harry watched incredulously as Snape walked over to him. "Potter, sit up and answer," he instructed, but oddly enough, he didn't sound intimidating at all.

Harry wriggled up into a seated position and Snape one-handedly fixed his pillows behind him. "I'm…er…what happened? Am I in your bedroom?" he asked in bewilderment.

"My guest bedroom," Snape said, placing the tray on Harry's lap. "As for what happened, you collapsed in my office from exhaustion, food deprivation, and a respiratory infection."

"Why aren't I in the hospital wing?" Harry asked in confusion.

"Due to several reasons Madam Pomfrey and I discussed, it has been decided that it would be better for you to remain down here for the time-being," Snape said vaguely and Harry knew not to push it.

"What day is it?" Harry asked anxiously, unsuccessfully searching around for a clock.

"Thursday. You spent Wednesday drifting in and out of sleep, though I doubt you remember being awake. You were quite out of it due to the potions you were on."

It appeared only one word had registered to Harry. "Thursday! I, I had a Potions test yesterday and I have a Charms essay due today. I don't think I finished!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Potter. For someone who has spent as much time as you have in the Hospital Wing, you seem to have forgotten that illness and injury are legitimate excuses for late work and making up exams."

"I'll get behind," Harry groaned. "It'll all pile up and I won't be able to catch up! What time is it?" he asked frantically. "I could still make it to some of my classes, right?"

"No, Potter, you cannot," Snape said sharply. "You will not be attending classes for a week at least, maybe more."

Harry's eyes bugged out in horror. "What? Why? I feel fine!"

"You are not _fine_. You have a respiratory infection, a compromised immune system, you're unhealthily underweight, and you are fatigued. I will not allow you to fall back into such a self-deprecating pattern and thus, you will not be attending classes until you are rid of this preposterous notion that your worth is measured by your grades." He calmed himself a bit and continued. "I've spoken with your professors and they all agree you could do with some time off."

"You can't do that!" Harry protested. He gasped. "Does Remus know I've skipped class?"

"You have not _skipped_ class; you've been ill!" Snape exclaimed incredulously. "As for Remus Lupin, you will not have to worry about him for awhile."

Harry looked at him in horrified awe. "Did you kill him?" he asked in a near-whisper.

"What! No, I did not! What sort of person do you think I am?" He paused to pour out the proper dose of some medicinal potion. "He's merely chained in the dungeons until he learns his lesson."

Harry's jaw dropped.

Snape smirked and handed him the potion. "Calm yourself, Potter, it was a joke."

Harry blinked in surprise. "You can joke?" he asked in confusion.

Snape looked at him indignantly, but couldn't help but be slightly amused. "Drink your potion and eat your breakfast. You have nothing to do for the rest of the day, so do not attempt to rush through your meals. You will not have access to any learning materials: school books, homework, and your friends have been forbidden to tell you what they learned in class or about any due dates or exams when they come to visit."

"Visit?" Harry asked blankly.

"Yes, you will remain here until I deem you ready to begin attending classes again," Snape informed him.

"Isn't that going to be a huge inconvenience for you? What about the potion you've been working on!" Harry asked before adopting a look of understanding. "Oh, did Dumbledore make you take me?"

Snape raised an eyebrow. "Nobody can _make_ me do anything, Potter. Now, eat your breakfast."

I……………….I

A few hours later found Harry anxiously pacing the living room. Snape was off teaching a Potions class and Harry was left with nothing to do but entertain the frantic notions drifting through his head. His thoughts jumped from Remus's reaction to the current situation, to whether Ron and Hermione would actually visit and if they did, what would be said, to an image of Harry spending another Family Night completely left out and shunted aside. He tried to imagine spending a week like this, but the idea was too daunting and he moved on to wondering if there was any way he could secretly take tests and turn in his homework, but even he had to eventually admit the idea wouldn't work since his professors were apparently all in on this insane idea together.

He had already written a long letter to Remus explaining the situation and begging for forgiveness, but as he appeared to be locked in Snape's chambers, he had no way to send it.

When Snape finally stepped out of the fireplace, he was surprised to find Harry polishing the mirrors.

"Potter, you do realize house elves clean my chambers every few days," he said calmly as he set his papers on the table.

"Well, I was going crazy! What else am I supposed to do when I'm not allowed to do any school work?" he exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air.

"You're a teenage boy and at the first sign of boredom you decided to polish the mirrors?" Snape asked with a raised eyebrow. He gestured at the coffee table where a bunch of Quidditch books lay. "Why didn't you peruse the books your friend brought down yesterday?"

"Who cares about Quidditch?" Harry asked angrily, turning back to finish polishing the mirror.

"Who cares about polishing my mirror?" Snape challenged. Harry shot a scowl at him. "Is this what you do for fun?"

"No, this is just what I _do_ at home," Harry growled.

"I see. For your relatives, you clean to gain their approval, for Lupin, it's grades," Snape remarked.

"No, the Dursleys would never approve of me no matter what," Harry grumbled.

"Then why put in the effort?"

"Oh I don't know, how about so I can eat and not be locked away?" Harry shot sarcastically.

Snape was taken aback and scowled. "That's a disgusting way to treat a child."

"I'm not a child," Harry said indignantly. "But don't you see? If Remus would let me live with him, I wouldn't have to deal with all that!"

"Yes, you'd merely have to have to suffer mental abuse and be manipulated into making yourself sick trying to please him," Snape said darkly. Harry glared at him.

"He did not manipulate me or mentally abuse me!"

"He exploited your loneliness…" Snape insisted angrily.

"I'm not lonely!"

"…and your need for a parental figure…"

"I don't need anyone!"

"…and your desperation to do whatever it takes to atone for nonexistent sins…"

"…they aren't nonexistent…"

"…just to give him someone to blame and take his anger out on!"

"HE SHOULD BLAME ME!" Harry screamed. He rapidly wiped away a few treacherous tears with the rag, accidentally smearing a streak of polish across his cheeks. "It was my fault," he said miserably.

"It was not," Snape said.

"It was," Harry said, sinking down to sit on the stool he'd been standing on to reach the mirror. "You should know. I didn't practice Occlumency. I didn't try. I was too stupid to figure out how to clear my stupid mind and led him to his death. And I could have gotten anyone else there killed too! I thought Hermione was dead for a moment and Neville had to be under the Cruciatus and so many people got hurt, all because of me! Because I didn't even try at stupid Occlumency I lost the only adult who ever even cared about me even a little, the only one who _ever_ offered to take me away from the Dursleys. Everyone else just left me there to rot, but Sirius wanted me! He _wanted _me to live with him! And how did I repay him? I got him killed. Remus deserves to hate me. He wouldn't hate me without good reason."

To Snape's horror, tears welled up in Harry's eyes. The boy jumped to his feet and started toward his room, but, on impulse, Snape reached out and grabbed his arm to stop him.

Harry tried turning his head away from him to hide his tears, trying to pull his arm away. "Stop. I just want to be alone," he cried.

"He has no reason to hate you and you can't blame yourself for your godfather's death. You were trying to save him, not put his life in danger. You know this Potter!" Snape insisted angrily, but Harry only buried his face in the crook of one of his arms, trying desperately to not let Snape see him cry. "Oh for the love of Merlin," Snape muttered, roughly pulling the teenager into an embrace. His own eyes widened in shock at what he'd done when Harry stiffened.

For a moment, they both stood there frozen in uncomfortable surprise. Snape wasn't sure if he should let go or if that would make things worse, and for once he could not figure out a quick way to resolve the situation. This was unfamiliar territory and he had no idea how to handle it.

Harry let out a half-laugh, half-sob and hesitantly put his arms around Snape. He tried to control himself but found himself crying into the Potions master's chest.

"It's not your fault, Potter," Snape insisted awkwardly, allowing the boy to hug him. "It was out of your control."

"I didn't want him to die," Harry sobbed softly, gripping onto the back of Snape's robes as if afraid the man would leave him there alone if he didn't hold on. "Remus says it's my fault."

"Don't be an idiot, of course you didn't want him to die. Black would never have thought that. Lupin's an imbecile who's misplacing his anger to you."

"But he's all I've got," Harry whimpered.

"No, he's not," Snape said quietly, protectively tightening his grip on the boy.

I……………….I

Though Harry's outpour of bottled up emotions had been good for his soul, it had not been good for his respiratory infection. Once his sobs had turned into sniffles, which turned into hoarse coughs, Snape forced him to sit on the couch, wrapped him in blankets, and stuck a thermometer under his tongue.

Harry watched as Snape checked the thermometer with a frown. "You have a fever. You will rest and refrain from unnecessary activity. No more of this cleaning nonsense. You don't want this turning into rheumatic fever."

"What's rheumatic fever?" Harry asked tiredly.

"Something you do not want to get. It can damage your organs, particularly your heart."

Harry's eyes widened. "And this is all from stress?" he asked incredulously.

"Well, stress and probably an exposure to someone with a cold or similar. The stress left you vulnerable to it and is what's making it more difficult for you to fight it off," Snape informed him.

"Just from stress?" Harry asked skeptically.

"Yes. I could go into the mechanics of the body in response to stress, but I think the excitement might become too much."

Harry couldn't help but chuckle, not used to the fact that Snape seemed to have a sense of humor in there somewhere.

"Let's settle for the fact that yes, it can suppress immune functioning. It can also stunt your growth and I'm supposing you don't want that, especially when you're probably due for a growth spurt soon."

Harry's eyes widened at that. "Are you serious? But I'm already one of the shortest guys in my year!"

"Exactly," Snape said warningly. "With a proper diet and enough food intake, I'm confident there would be another growth spurt in your near future, but if you continue with this level of stress, you will most likely remain this height."

Harry frowned and laid back against the pillows Snape had set up for him. "Well, it doesn't matter anyway. When I go back to the Dursleys for the summer, the proper diet and food intake thing isn't going to work, so I won't grow anyway."

Snape made a noncommittal noise and excused himself to the kitchen to order up some chicken soup for the boy.


	5. Part Five

Author's Note: Hey everyone! We've finally come to the end of Family Night! I hope you all enjoyed the ride! I wanted to take this time to bow down in thanks to my wonderful friend and beta, ckat44. I wrote this fic for her in the first place, since I know she loves her angst and her Snape and Harry interaction, lol! She has done so much for this fic I can't even say. She has helped me tremendously with working on Snape's characterization in particular and I believe I have had a huge learning experience through working with her on this fic. She was never afraid to point out to me things that didn't seem to fit, even down to the tiniest thing that didn't seem right for someone to say. I couldn't have done this without her, so she deserves a huge thank you for not only giving me the motivation to write and post this fic, but for helping me shape it into what it is. Thank you so much Katie! You are a thousand different kinds of awesome.

**Family Night**

Part 5/5

Snape looked up from his grading with an eyebrow raised. Harry was sitting across from him, arms folded on the table, his chin resting on them. The boy was watching Snape grade and the man found it slightly daunting.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" he asked.

Harry grinned drowsily and nodded, coughing hoarsely but not looking much bothered by it. Earlier in the day, his friends had stopped by and they'd had (in Snape's opinion) a disgustingly sentimental conversation about how dreadfully sorry they were, everyone trying to outdo the other in apologies. Though it had been a teary teenagery mess, Snape was glad to see Harry's spirits had at least been lifted.

"It's funny to see the grading process from this perspective. You seem to have some very creative insults stored up, just waiting to give to your poor, unsuspecting students."

"If they're unsuspecting at this point, their brains are obviously not sufficient enough to function and should not be in my class," Snape muttered.

"Why did that person get an F?" Harry asked sympathetically.

"Because it is obvious he did not read the chapter. He mixed up the ingredients of the assigned potion so horribly that if he had used this plan to concoct the actual thing, as he and his classmates are supposed to do this week, the result would be a mixture whose explosion would probably kill half of Hogwarts."

Harry's eyebrows shot up. "Oh, well that's definitely not good then. You'll need to fix them with a particularly creative insult," he said, clearly amused.

"Any suggestions, or will variations of the phrase '_simpering idiot'_ do?" Snape asked with a slightly malicious smirk.

"How about, '_Mr. Kemmer, it is apparent that you do not know base ingredients from acidic ones. It is doubly clear that you do not know your head from your arse. Though it is obvious where the confusion comes in, please try to sort out the matter before entering my classroom again,'_" Harry suggested with a tired chuckle.

Snape smirked with amusement. "Fitting," he commented and wrote it word for word in the margin, causing Harry to laugh despite himself. At a particularly painful sounding cough, Snape summoned a cup of hot lemon water and scooted it toward Harry who made a face. "Quit your grimacing; it'll soothe your throat. Breathe in as much of the steam as you can for your lungs. You'll thank me later."

Harry's nose crinkled as he sipped the hot liquid. "You have far too much fun with that," he said mischievously, indicating the papers Snape was grading, "but you know, I can see where the entertainment value lies."

"I do this to get students to pay attention to my comments and realize the seriousness of their blunders. It's for the sake of education," Snape insisted indignantly.

Harry grinned and sipped his lemon water. "Sure it is. Now, let me think of another good one, and I'll even try to work in '_simpering idiot,_' just for you."

IiIiIiI

"You're putting up more of a fight than I'd predicted," Snape admitted.

"You'll never win," Harry asserted confidently.

"Checkmate," Snape declared.

"Bugger." Harry grinned sheepishly at Snape's stern look. "Oops? I mean _darn_."

Snape shook his head in amusement.

The past few days had been interesting, if nothing else. To keep Harry from stressing about school or dying of boredom, Snape had found himself trying to find ways of keeping the boy entertained and in doing so, the two had gotten along surprisingly well. Snape would never admit it, even fully so to himself, but he actually sort of liked having someone to take care of, a child who needed him as Harry did, especially due to his illness. He'd been trying to get Harry to realize that his relationship with Lupin wasn't a good one, that he shouldn't want a parental figure whose affections were conditional. At times, he thought he might have gotten through, and at other times he was sure Harry was trying to figure out if there was a possibility that Lupin would forgive him and rescue him from his miserable life at the Dursleys'.

In fact, now that their chess game was over, Snape could see Harry's thoughts were beginning to drift in that direction. He checked the clock. It was nine pm, and was now officially after curfew. He had a flash of an idea to get Harry's mind off things, one that would hopefully improve his spirits. He figured Harry was well enough to do it if he bundled up enough.

"Potter, go put on your scarf and gloves," he instructed suddenly. "And don't forget your cloak. We're going outside."

"It's night," Harry thought to point out.

"I am aware of that, thank you," Snape replied, rolling his eyes, "and I know from when I was a student that night is a particularly nice time to fly around the Quidditch pitch. It is much more peaceful."

"You're going to fly a broomstick?" Harry asked incredulously. Snape shot him a slightly exasperated look, silently asking him if he ever thought before he spoke. "Oh, you mean, _I_ can go flying? I haven't been in so long…" he trailed off with a wistful look before racing off to grab his broomstick and put on the extra clothes Snape had suggested. Snape was relieved Weasley had simply brought down all of Harry's things rather than try to discriminate between what he would and would not need, as it made the whole thing much easier.

He threw on his own winter cloak and grabbed some essays he still needed to grade and soon the two were heading through the empty halls toward the Quidditch pitch.

IiIiIiI

Snape sat in the stands using a Lumos charm to see the papers he was grading, yet the miserable excuses for essays weren't holding his attention. Instead, he couldn't help but watch Harry and try to restrain himself from ordering the boy out of the air.

He inhaled sharply once again as Harry performed another death-defying stunt. When Harry playfully tried to stand and balance on his hovering broom, one foot in front of the other, Snape felt his stomach drop.

"Potter!" he barked. "Potter, you moronic boy!"

When Harry looked over, Snape shook his head angrily and pointed down. Harry plopped back into a seated position with a slightly confused look. Snape figured nobody had ever tried to stop him from breaking his neck before.

Snape felt his jaw clench anxiously as Harry zoomed around the poles, flipping upside-down and right-side up as he flew.

"Boy has a bloody death wish," Snape muttered to himself, wincing as Harry shot up and down in drastic dives. He hadn't known letting the boy go flying would result in needing a stiff drink. He watched as Harry shot up until he was a small dot and then spiraled back down. "What are you doing what are you doing what are you doing," Snape chanted under his breath as he watched Harry plummeted toward the ground at breakneck speed. Snape hadn't been an excellent flier in his day, but even he knew that if Harry was going to try pulling out of that dive sharply, he shouldn't be corkscrewing down, as it would throw him off balance when he tried to pull up. "Fuck!" he gasped as Harry nearly collided with the ground. But when Harry pulled up, because of the awkward momentum, he was thrown from his broom and landed with a thud on the field.

Snape jumped up with a curse of the most profane language and raced to the field where Harry was lying. As he drew close, he could at least tell that Harry was conscious and moving slightly, even if it was just to clutch his head with a groan.

Dropping to his knees beside the Gryffindor, Snape quickly scanned Harry for any sign of broken limbs or protruding bones or deep gashes. Harry's eyes were screwed shut and the heels of his hands were pressed against his forehead.

"Potter!" Snape shouted urgently. "Harry, are you injured? Open your eyes and look at me!"

Harry groaned and wrenched his eyes open to look into the frantic face of his teacher. "You called me Harry," he managed with a smile.

Snape rolled his eyes. "Where are you hurt," he demanded.

"I'm fine," Harry groaned, struggling to sit up with a helping hand from Snape. "Just knocked the wind out of me. And I think it jolted my head around a bit."

"Hold still," Snape ordered and ran his wand around Harry's head. He sighed in relief at the results. "Everything appears fine. No cranial damage" He glared at the teen. "What the hell were you thinking up there? You could have gotten yourself killed!"

"Well, I didn't," Harry offered and Snape growled in exasperation.

"Well you are certainly done with flying for tonight," Snape informed him sharply, summoning the broom and his papers. "And we're going to have a talk about these irresponsible stunts before you can go flying again and if I ever see you pull something like that again, I'm confiscating your broom."

Harry stared at him oddly and Snape jolted with the realization of how parental he'd just sounded.

"'Kay," Harry said, still looking a bit dazed, and not just from the fall.

Snape helped him to his feet and stilled as Harry gasped in pain. "What?" he asked urgently.

"My ankle," Harry admitted with a wince. "I think I might have sprained it."

Snape sighed. "Alright, let's get back to my chambers and I'll heal it."

"Sprained-ankle serum?" Harry asked cheekily.

"More like Idiot's Elixir," Snape grumbled, pulling Harry's arm across his shoulders and helping him hobble into the castle toward the dungeons.

"Are we almost there?" Harry ground out through clenched teeth, emitting sounds of protest each time he had to put weight on his bad foot, which was aching harshly after the long walk.

"One more staircase and a short hall," Snape informed him.

They turned a corner and froze in seeing who was blocking their path.

"Remus?" Harry asked meekly, the hopeful sound in his voice making Snape pull him just a bit closer to his side.

Remus approached them with an angry look.

"Where have you been, Harry?" Remus demanded.

"With Professor Snape," Harry answered guiltily. "I've been a bit ill so I haven't been able to go to classes."

"You couldn't go to class but you could go flying in the middle of the night?" Remus asked, gesturing sharply at the broomstick in Harry's hand.

"Harry's recent absence from classes is none of your business, Lupin, but I'm sure you've already been informed of the reasons behind it nonetheless. It's an order from his professors," Snape sneered.

"So now he's so special he shouldn't have to work as hard as the other students and must now take mandatory holidays to keep from becoming overworked?" Remus asked incredulously. "Did anyone stop to think that maybe if he worked a bit harder, less people would die? He needs to be pushed, can't any of you see that?"

"Remus, I'm sorry," Harry said distraughtly, pulling away from Snape and stepping toward Remus pleadingly.

"Get away from me," Remus barked emotionally and Harry jumped back, clearly upset.

"That's enough, Lupin." Snape snapped furiously.

"Keep out of this, Snape!" Remus yelled, turning on Harry and pointing furiously at the Potions professor. "What have you been doing hanging around with him?" Remus demanded. "James's and Sirius's worst enemy? What do you think they'd say if they were here?"

"I'd think they'd want me to get better," Harry said in a tight voice that betrayed how desperately he was trying to gain control of his emotions. "Sn—_Professor_ Snape's treated me much better than the Dursleys ever did, even if it was only for a little while, so I think my dad would have been happy."

Snape looked at Harry in surprise. He would never have guessed Harry would have stood up to Remus, especially on his behalf. He felt an inexplicable burst of pride and hated Lupin all the more.

"Your dad would be rolling over in his grave if he could see you right now!" the werewolf yelled, half-hysterical. "He'd be ashamed! You got Sirius killed and you don't even care! You're running around with the person that probably wanted Sirius dead the most!"

"You are out of control, Lupin!" Snape warned, but that didn't stop the unhinged man's tirade at the vulnerable teen.

"Do you even care that you took away the last person who was keeping me sane?"

Tears welled up in Harry's eyes as he stammered apologies.

"It's unfortunate, but you are Voldemort's main enemy, Harry. The only one who can defeat him. You can't keep playing around like a child and I seem to be the only one who realizes that! I thought you were going to try to make up for causing Sirius's death by making sure it doesn't happen to anyone else! You've been working harder; you wouldn't have done that if you didn't know I was right! Dumbledore's accusing me of being to hard on you, saying that the best thing for you is to be alone with Snape! But until _he_…" He jutted a finger sharply at Snape. "…interfered, you agreed with me! I was helping you! Helping you so people we love don't keep dying and I can't help it if you're the only one who can stop that from happening!"

"That's rich, you delusional—"

"I was doing it for _you_!" Harry shouted angrily, interrupting Snape and furiously wiping at the wetness on his cheeks. "I just wanted you to be proud of me! I just wanted you to come and see me and talk to me about something else besides the stupid war!"

"You don't need to be coddled and told everything's all right! It's NOT! It's not all right! Sirius is dead! You have to think about your place in the war, Harry!" Remus yelled.

"I think about it all the bloody time!" Harry exclaimed. "You think I need help remembering about that! Well I don't!"

"Obviously you do or you wouldn't have let them take you away from training for it!"

Snape stepped forward with a sneer. "Don't kid yourself into thinking you're doing something noble here, Lupin. This isn't about the war and you know it! This is about misplaced revenge on a child! Harry has plenty of time to worry about the future without _you_ trying to steal away any joy he has in life!"

"It _is_ about the war! Harry's not a kid anymore! He can't be or people are going to die! I can't believe _you_ of all people are buying into this shite, Severus. Surely you must understand what it's going to be like if Harry can't get his act together," Remus growled.

"I know what war is like, Lupin," Snape said darkly. "I also know Harry's going to have a big part in this one at some time and for that, he needs to be trained. But that doesn't mean you are allowed to use that as an excuse to mentally abuse him!"

"Shut up, Death Eater! You're just trying to make him forget what he's fighting for!" Remus practically screamed.

"I believe you're managing that well enough on your own," Snape said in a deadly voice.

Remus scowled at him and turned back to Harry. "We're at war, Harry, and like it or not, your choices affect people's lives. If you slack off like this, people are going to die! You're taking off the week? How many lives is that, Harry? How many people are going to die when you're too incompetent to do your job! You're supposed to be a savior, Harry! You're supposed to save people, not get them killed!"

Snape stepped protectively in front of Harry.

"Lupin, I'm warning you…" Snape growled. He drew his wand, but Harry grabbed his arm and shook his head pleadingly.

"But you didn't save Sirius, now did you? DID YOU? You let him die! You let him…"

There was an audible crack as Snape punched him across the face with his free fist. As Remus scrambled to his feet, he found himself at the receiving end of Snape's wand. Snape looked livid and Harry was staring at him with tears streaming down his face, his eyes expressing his emotions so clearly as they always had, as Lily's always had. Those eyes showed disbelief, whether at Remus's words or the physical violence that had just erupted between two supposedly mature adults, he couldn't be certain. He himself was shocked that Severus had thrown a punch. The man had clearly done it to defend Harry, to protect him. Had Remus somehow become someone Harry needed to be protected from?

What was perhaps worse was the mixed look of shame and guilt and misery and pain swirling around in those green depths. Remus was forcibly reminded of the times he'd comforted a distraught James back in school, and the time he had found Lily crying in the astronomy tower in their fifth year. It had hurt him so badly to see his friends in pain and here was Harry, a combination of the two of them, eyes brimming with all the horrible feelings Remus had prayed Harry would never have to feel. The same gut-wrenching feeling he used to have when his friends were upset was coming back and hitting him full force. But this was worse. So much worse. Because he knew, he suddenly _knew_, those eyes were brimming over with agony because of him.

"Harry?" he asked in a tight voice. To his horror, Harry flinched, he _flinched_, at his voice and Snape used his free arm to pull Harry closer to his back so to better shield him. Remus felt sick. He couldn't face the real reason he'd been so harsh on Harry, but suddenly saw the true degree of his demands on the boy and that they were not just because of the war. Most of all, he saw the pain he had caused. He had never, ever wanted to cause pain, one reason he'd been so ashamed of being a werewolf, because of the possibility that he might hurt someone. But look what he had done. He had somehow hurt a boy he truly did care about so much deeper than he could have as a wolf.

"You need help, Lupin," Snape said with a cold glare. "You're going to leave Potter alone, understood?"

Remus nodded almost imperceptibly and leaned heavily against the wall. Snape wrapped an arm around Harry and pulled him to his side both for comfort and to help him as the pair made their way toward Snape's chambers, Harry's face half-buried into Snape's robes.

IiIiIiI

Snape sat on the couch next to Harry and handed the distressed boy a cup of tea, laced with a potion to heal his ankle.

"I've lost Remus and I've got no one left," he sniffed mournfully, wiping at his cheeks with his sleeve.

"Oh really. Forgetting about Granger and Weasley? It seems they must be extremely attached to you if they're still trying so desperately to regain the close friendship you three once had after you've done your best to push them away this year," Snape pointed out.

Harry nodded. "Yeah, I've been awful to them," he agreed, looking at his tea with a dazed look. "It's just that the only thing I've ever wanted in my whole life was for a mum or a dad or some adult that wanted me, you know? I know you probably think I'm being melodramatic but I have some pretty big things I need to deal with and all my friends, they tell their parents about their problems and suddenly it's like their parents are doing the worrying for them. And sometimes they just come back from a talk with their parents almost cured of their problems, saying it's not a big deal anymore. The only time I have ever felt like that was with Remus in third year, when I told him about the Dementors and he said he'd help me so I didn't have to worry about it anymore because I knew he would make things right. And there's other stuff too. Like when Ron got a really bad flu last year he went home and his parents took care of him. With me, no matter how sick I get I'm always in the hospital wing and the only adult worrying about me is Madam Pomfrey. I just wanted someone who would show up for this stupid Family Night because they wanted to and have them be proud to see what I had done, or even just because they didn't want me to spend it alone. And now Remus is gone, so what's the use? Why even care about grades if nobody's checking my report card?" Harry asked bitterly.

"Because you have a life to live," Snape said sternly. "You can't live that life for anyone else but yourself, Potter, or you're going to be in for some great disappointments." He paused but reluctantly continued. "Look, Potter, I was clearly never close with your father, but I think you should know you were his pride and joy. He prattled on about you so much at Order meetings that we nearly kicked him out; it was really quite disgusting."

Harry looked up at him with a teary chuckle. "Really?"

"I have nightmares of the sentimentality even now." Snape cleared his throat uncomfortably. "But you should know that your parents would have, you know, been proud of you and such."

Harry smiled. "You're getting quite sentimental yourself there, Professor," he teased, though Snape could tell how much his reassurance had meant to the boy. After all, Snape was hardly one to sugar coat the truth, especially for Harry Potter.

"Yes, I will be having a stiff drink after you get off to sleep and hope I can forget all about the wretched mush that I emitted just now," he said with a self-disgusted tone that caused Harry to laugh.

"Thank you, Professor," Harry said sincerely.

Snape nodded in acknowledgment, watching as Harry blinked and looked at him seriously.

"Um, I just realized that I was saying some sort of stupid stuff and wanted to apologize. I don't want you to think that I haven't acknowledged what you've done for me," Harry said guiltily.

"What are you blathering on about, Potter?"

"Well, before. I said I never felt that someone was making things better by just talking to them except with Remus and that's not true. I feel better when I talk to you. And especially this week, I knew I could tell you things and I had that weird feeling like I didn't have to worry so much about it anymore. It's sort of like magic, actually. And tonight, you know, I knew you'd take care of things with Remus, that you'd defend me, so it wasn't true when I said that Remus with the Dementors was the only time I thought an adult would take care of my problems for me, that wasn't true. And it wasn't true that I said I always have to stay in the hospital wing when I'm sick. I mean, that was pretty stupid of me to say when I'm sick and I'm here and you've been taking care of me. So I just wanted you to know that I do know everything you've done for me and I don't want you to think I'm ungrateful, because I am…grateful that is," Harry said awkwardly, but with the utmost sincerity.

"There's no need for thanks," Snape said uncomfortably after a moment. "Now drink your tea and let me see your ankle."

IiIiIiI

As it approached a time when both Harry and Snape were growing very aware that Harry would need to get back to classes soon, both secretly found that they didn't want that day to come. Harry had finally found an adult that had protected him and comforted him, however unconventionally so, and it was going to be very difficult to voluntarily leave. However, he wouldn't fight it. Harry wanted an adult that wanted him and that wasn't something he could force on anyone, especially Snape.

Snape felt very confused as the two ate their last dinner together before Harry would move back to the Gryffindor dormitory. He should have been relieved the annoying Gryffindor was leaving. He would be getting back his privacy, his time to think and wouldn't have to worry about entertaining a bored teenager. He tried to think of all the annoying things Harry had done during his stay, but instead of aggravation at the memories, he felt a strange sense of contentment like he had never felt before, not even once. Sadly enough, the short time he'd spent with Harry had probably been the most fun he'd had in his life, if only because he had actually spent time with someone whose intentions Snape never had to doubt. He never had to wonder if Harry was trying to plot around him, he never had to worry about Harry's possible underlying motives or allegiances were, and he never had to wonder if Harry was spending time with him out of some sort of misplaced pity. And Harry was different than most of the people he associated with. He was innocent and full of life; he had accepted Snape's sense of humor for what it was and actually laughed at his jokes. Nobody had ever laughed at his jokes. He had always wondered if they were too dimwitted to understand them or if they were just afraid of him.

But Harry hadn't been afraid. He had treated Snape like a person rather than an untouchable or as someone to avoid. Now that he'd gotten a taste for it, Snape was oddly uncomfortable with letting it go.

"Professor," Harry asked him curiously. "what do you do for fun? All you ever talk about is doing research."

Snape's eyebrow shot up. This was what he meant; nobody had ever asked him that before except as a derogatory taunt.

"That _is_ what I do for fun. I try to invent new potions or spells, especially counterspells to darker curses." At Harry's raised eyebrow he frowned. "What?" he asked defensively.

"Well, no offense, sir, but that really does _not_ sound fun," Harry admitted and Snape had to admit he was probably right.

"Expanding your mind is quite rewarding; you should attempt it some time," he said with a smirk, realizing quickly that it was probably not in good taste after all Harry had been through that year. He quickly changed the subject. "What would you propose I do for fun?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I dunno, go out with friends?" Harry paused and his eyebrows knitted together. "Do you have friends?"

At Snape's scowl, Harry hurried to apologize. "I didn't mean that in a mean way. Who would I be to talk? I never had a single friend until Hogwarts and each summer it's back to the loner life. I mean, I used to be a pariah at my primary school. I was just some shrimpy nobody who got bullied around all the time. I guess it was meant in some cosmic way to balance out this part of my life. But anyway, I'm just curious, have you ever been on a date?"

"Of course I've been on dates!" Snape snapped indignantly. "I'm thirty-six for Merlin's sake!"

"Can you tell me about them?" Harry asked excitedly. "I won't tell anyone, I swear."

"Absolutely not, or would you like me to inquire into your tryst with Miss Chang?"

Harry shrugged. "There wasn't really anything to tell with me and Cho. She cried a lot, even during the one time we kissed, she was very girlie, and then on the only date we ever had, she got jealous because she thought I fancied Hermione, and that was pretty much it. Your turn!"

"As much as I was enthralled to hear of your teenage romance woes, I am certainly not obligated to tell a dating tale of my own. If you had wanted that, you should have secured it before playing your own card. You really should learn to be a little more Slytherin."

"Aw, no fair," Harry whined playfully.

"Besides, why do you automatically assume I'm single?" Snape asked indignantly.

"Because you don't wear a wedding ring and never leave the school. Professor Flitwick has a wife and he leaves Hogwarts every weekend to spend it with her. Aside from him, I assumed most of the staff would have to be single in order to take a position in a boarding school," Harry explained tactfully.

"Perhaps I simply do not want to let anyone know I have a wife," Snape suggested. "I can be very discreet when I need to be."

"Why would you do that?" Harry asked playing along with the hypothetical situation.

"Perhaps she refuses to take part in the war and my position as a spy would have endangered her life and mine if the Dark Lord found out," Snape challenged.

"Of course you just had to end being a spy so you could have come out with it," Harry pointed out.

"She could still be in danger," Snape argued.

"Or maybe, it has to be hidden not because of you, but because of her," Harry suggested. "Because she has to be seen as single for her career." Harry lowered his voice to a near-whisper and leaned toward the Potions master in a conspiring sort of manner. "You're secretly married to a supermodel, aren't you?"

Snape surprised even himself by bursting into laughter. Real, out-loud laughter. He couldn't remember a time when he'd actually laughed in this carefree sort of way. "Well, Potter, I'd certainly hope I'd marry someone with a few brain cells."

Harry gave a fake look of indignation. "Supermodels can be smart too! I'm sure your secret wife would be furious if she heard you calling her dumb." He smirked and looked to his plate. "Besides, we both know it's just about the sex," he said casually, taking a bite of his food to hide his snickering.

Snape gaped at him. "Potter!" he admonished, but couldn't help but get sucked into their little game of teasing. "That is of course very true, but it's absolutely not polite dinnertime conversation."

He was very satisfied when Harry nearly choked on his food while breaking down into hysterical laughter.

IiIiIiI

When dinner was through, the atmosphere changed to a sad one as Harry dragged his trunk to the door. Snape cleared his throat to say his farewell, but found the words became stuck in his throat.

"Thank you so much, Professor, for everything," Harry said, radiating with sincerity.

Snape nodded jerkily. "You had better take care of yourself this time. Follow the schedule we worked out for you and don't get into trouble. Regular meals, sleep and free time, no exceptions."

Harry nodded. "Yeah, I know."

The two stood there in silence for a few moments, not knowing what to say.

Suddenly Harry stepped forward and hugged Snape so briefly that Snape was almost unsure for a moment if it had really happened. But then Harry quickly wiped away a lone rebel tear.

"See you in class," he muttered before turning and hurrying out the door.

"Potter!" Snape called after a second's deliberation and the teen turned around hopefully. "If you are not otherwise occupied, come here for dinner tomorrow night. I'd like to be certain you're adjusting well."

Harry nodded with a bit of a lighter look than before. "And Professor? Outside of class, please, call me Harry."

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Snape looked around at all the gaping faces, fixing his trademark glare on each and every one of them, which certainly stopped the staring problem momentarily. He looked to his side to see Harry trying desperately not to laugh, still looking a bit in awe of the situation himself.

"Quiet, Harry," he grumbled, practically growling at some third year who was staring at him with his jaw hanging open.

"You know, if you want to go, I'd understand. You don't have to stay," Harry repeated for the forty-seventh time.

"Don't be an idiot; of course I'm staying," Snape said firmly. "It was my idea after all. And if you tell me I don't have to stay one more time, I will carry out those threats I made on the thirty-fourth time."

Harry's thankful smile was all he needed as encouragement to hold strong in the extremely awkward situation. It was getting difficult, however, to ignore the tearfully grateful looks Mrs. Weasley and the Granger girl were casting at him, not to mention the hundreds of stunned gazes that kept sneaking his way.

The chattering quieted down as Dumbledore stood at the teachers' table where Snape would have usually been sitting.

"Welcome, to the year's final Family Night. It seems as though we were having the Welcoming feast just yesterday, but the truest testament to the time that has passed are the students sitting before us. Each of them has come far from where they were at the first Family Night and I'm certain no one can see that as well as their families and loved ones, the ones watching them from afar as they transform little by little from children into respectable witches and wizards. I hope all of you are very proud of the students you have come to see, as am I."

Snape was thankful when the food finally appeared and the horribly sentimental speech was over, trying to suppress his disgust at the cooing parents around him. He could feel people staring at him again, waiting to see if he'd fawn over Harry, no doubt. He shot them scowls in return that clearly said, "not in this lifetime" and also managed to implant the worry that he might still be able to change their Potions grades last minute if they didn't stop staring.

Of course, he actually did feel a bit proud of Harry. After all, he had come much farther than most of the other students who had merely gained book knowledge, or at least claimed to. Thankfully, Harry understood his policy on public displays of affection of any kind and had been satisfied (well, more like overjoyed) when Snape had managed to somehow, in an indirect way of course, get across that he was proud of him over dinner the previous night when it was just the two of them.

"So, Ron, Ginny, any grades you need to warn us about before we speak with your professors?" Mrs. Weasley asked sternly.

Ron went red and looked up at his mother sheepishly. "Er…I think my grade dropped in Charms."

Snape turned to Harry. "What about you?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. "I've been keeping up with most of your marks, but anything surprising?" He was glad he had to ask since that meant Harry didn't obsessively talk about his marks anymore.

Harry and Ron exchanged a guilty look. "Er, yeah, I kind of might have failed Divination."

"Er, me too," Ron admitted.

"How did you two manage that?" Mrs. Weasley asked in exasperation.

"Well, we used to make up predictions and well, we were really good at it, but then Trelawney decided to grade this class based on if our predictions came true…" Harry trailed off with a helpless shrug.

Snape sipped his wine. "Good riddance. That class isn't worth the energy. I would be more concerned if you had passed that class."

Harry grinned and took a bite of his mashed potatoes. He couldn't believe Snape was sitting with him at the Family Night feast. It had floored him when Snape informed Harry he would be attending. He still couldn't believe how much had happened because of the Family Nightmares, as Harry had thought of it before this current one. Because of the week Harry had spent with him, he'd no longer been able to maintain his role as a spy. Harry had felt extremely guilty about it, but Snape had assured him during one of their usual dinners that it was for the best, as he was considering some plans for the summer where it wouldn't have worked anyway, but try as he might, Harry couldn't get him to spill what those plans were.

As dinner finished, students and parents filtered out of the hall. But Harry had already showed or told Snape about all his projects. He didn't care that the night was over, though. He was happy enough that Snape would have faced the awkwardness and embarrassment of sitting at the Gryffindor table at Family Night, just for him.

"Thank you so much for coming tonight, Professor," Harry gushed as soon as the two were out of the vicinity of gaping families or staff members. "I know it was sort of stupid and everything but…"

"Harry, I need to ask you something," Snape interrupted, actually sounding nervous. Harry looked at him worriedly.

"Is everything okay, Professor?"

"Yes, yes, I just need to speak to you about something." Snape looked suspiciously around and pulled Harry along the secluded hall, into a part of the castle where it would be very unlikely to meet anyone to interrupt them. "Harry, you've been asking what plans I have for the summer that would make my retirement as a spy be a beneficial move. Well, those plans are tentative, pending approval by one final person."

Harry nodded, trying not to look too eager to find out what the mysterious plans were, or too confused as to why Snape would be telling him of his summer plans in private.

"Now, during the summer, I stay at the manor I inherited from my family. No one lives in it except for me."

"Oh, you gave your supermodel wife her own manor?" Harry teased and Snape indulged him with a nervous smile, which only left Harry more perplexed.

"It's big, but there isn't much for a child…a _teenager_ to do, though I do have a big yard that could be nice for flying. I have a huge library, and it may even contain books you'd be interested in. I own a lot of land with it and there's a creek right nearby. It's not near anything, rather isolated, though of course it is connected to the Floo system. It's very safe and protected, though after talking to Albus, he put up some extra wards, just in case…do you see where I'm going with this?"

Harry tried to see, he really did, but was forced to shake his head in response. It sounded as if Snape was trying to sell him his house, but he wasn't stupid enough to voice that guess as it didn't make any sense at all.

"I'm obviously not very good at this," Snape sighed, running a hand through his hair. Harry had never seen the man so discomposed.

"It sounds like a nice house," Harry offered.

"I'm not asking you to compliment it, I'm asking you to…to live in it," Snape said warily. "Live in it with me…as your guardian."

Harry was floored. He couldn't move, he couldn't speak, he couldn't do anything but gape at the Potions master.

"I'm not very fun, of course, but I do not want to see you going back to those abusive Muggles during the summer. And I'm not doing this out of pity," he quickly added, knowing Harry's sensitivity in that area. "I'm doing this because I would…enjoy…your company," he managed with some difficulty.

"Guardian?" Harry sputtered. "But the blood protection from my aunt…"

"I can protect you as well as your relatives, just in a different way. The wards around my home may not be as specific to you, but they should be sufficient. And if somehow they were breached, I would defend you. And, of course, I'll be able to protect you _from_ your relatives," Snape said with a tinge of anger toward the Dursleys.

Snape watched as tears welled up in Harry's eyes. "Are you…really? Are you sure?" he asked in a tight voice. "You'd really want me to stay with you for the summer?"

"Not just the summer. If you'd be agreeable, I'd have custody of you transferred to me permanently, but if that's too much you could just…"

He was cut off as Harry collided with him, wrapping his arms fiercely around Snape and beginning to sob with happiness. Snape smiled and hugged Harry back, patting the boy's back as Harry chanted, "Thank you thank you thank you thank you," into his chest.

IiIiIiI

Harry hugged Hermione as Ron watched the fond farewell with a grin, happier than he could possibly describe to see Harry so cheerful and to have him back in the trio.

Hermione pulled Harry's cloak tighter around him in a motherly fashion, causing Harry to roll his eyes.

"You take care of yourself, this summer, Harry. I'm not kidding. You'll make sure he eats a ton, won't you, Professor?" Hermione asked the man standing behind Harry.

"Of course, Miss Granger," Snape said, placing a hand on Harry's shoulder as if to show her he was going to take his role as Harry's guardian very seriously, and do much more than make sure Harry ate food like a regular human.

"And now that you have access to a Floo, maybe you could come over occasionally," Ron said hopefully. Harry shot an inquiring look at the Potions master, who nodded in approval.

"That would be great!" Harry grinned, the two boys exchanging a quick, macho type hug.

A whistle sounded and the last of the stragglers jumped on the Hogwarts Express. Hermione gave Harry another quick hug before she and Ron jumped on the train. Harry waved to them cheerily as the train pulled out of the station.

"I saw you got an owl this morning," Snape mentioned as the two walked back toward the castle where they would floo to Snape Manor. "Was it Lupin again?"

"Yeah. He seems to be doing a lot better now with the therapy and all. He apologized again and went on about things you've already told me a thousand times, like how it wasn't me and about him misplacing his anger and everything," Harry said in a casual enough tone that Snape smiled just slightly, as it seemed Harry was starting to believe what Snape had been telling him. "And he asked me to live with him. Can you believe it? After I worked so hard for it all year and had just given it up for lost, he asks me to live with him!"

Snape felt his insides freeze, but made sure his emotions didn't show outwardly.

"What are you going to tell him?"

Harry looked at him in confusion. "What do you think? I sent an owl back right away and basically told him '_hell no_'…actually it was more like a '_thanks but no thanks_' sort of deal, but I let him know I was very happy to have you as my guardian." He looked up to Snape in fear. "Why? Would you rather I move in with him?"

"Of course not, you ridiculous boy," Snape said with an inward grin. It looked like they both had some insecurities that needed work, but they had time. Snape slung an arm of Harry's shoulders.

"So, I've made myself a rigorous study plan to make up for my dismal grades from the last quarter. I figure I'll be able to start pretty much right away," Harry said. Snape looked at him in a panic, but merely glared when he found himself faced with Harry's mischievous grin. "Well, fine, if you insist I fly around all summer, who am I to argue?"

Snape shook his head in amusement. It was definitely going to be a summer to remember.

**THE END**

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A/N: Well, that's all folks! I hope you all enjoyed the fic! Please pop me a review to let me know what you think even if it's one word and fifty years from the posting date!


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